Bang Head Comic Strips - Page 44

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571 Results for Bang Head

View 431 - 440 results for bang head comic strips. Discover the best "Bang Head" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 31, 2003's comic on:


Tags #cat show, #clothing, #date, #good listener, #mindless replica, #uninteresting stories

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A female coworker asks Dilbert, "Would it be okay if I asked your mindless replica for a date?" The coworker continues, "I'm full of uninteresting stories and I need a guy who's a good listener." The coworker and the Visibuddy are at dinner. The coworker says, "Now I'll describe the clothing of each person at the cat show." The Visibuddy hits himself in the head with a fork, "Thunk!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 31, 2003's comic on:


Tags #ceo placements, #magic 8 ball, #performed better, #dogbert the headhunter

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Headline: Dogbert the Headhunter. Dogbert says to a client, "Let me tell you how good my CEO placements have been." Dogbert continues, "An astonishing fifty percent of them have performed better than the other half!" Dogbert continues, "If you're on a budget, I recommend one of our stuffed CEO units with a 'Magic 8 Ball' head."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 08, 2003's comic on:


Tags #Dogbert, #head hunter, #ceo section, #resume, #re word, #less criminal sounding, #more honest, #plundered

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Headline: Dogbert the Headhunter. Dogbert is meeting with a client. He says, "We'll need to reword the CEO section of your resume." Dogbert continues, "For example, there's never a right time to use the word 'plundered.'" Dogbert continues, "And instead of 'suckers ignored our P/E ratio,' say you 'enhanced stockholder value.'" The client replies, "Wow. You're good."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 09, 2003's comic on:


Tags #revenue estimates, #research, #too late, #higher revenue, #stress, #flashlight, #eyes, #science

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The Boss pokes his head in to Dilbert's cubicle and says, "Double the revenue estimates and make sure the research supports it." Dilbert responds, "But.. but... it's too late! The research is done, and it won't support higher revenue!" Dilbert is sitting on a doctor's table, shivering. The doctor flashes a light on Dilbert's face and says, "Your stress is from a combination of drive-by- management and a flashlight in your eyes."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 10, 2003's comic on:


Tags #wants a husbnd, #cooks and cleans, #raises kids, #pursue career, #total turn on, #lemon wedges

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Alice says to Carol, "I want a husband who cooks and cleans and raises the kids while I pursue my career." Alice continues, "To me, that sort of man would be a total turn-on." A man wearing an apron approaches Alice and says, "Yoo-Hoo! Who likes lemon wedges?" A heart floats above Alice's head.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 26, 2003's comic on:


Tags #accounting trolls, #profits, #worst case scenario

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Headline: Accounting Trolls. The Boss hands a troll a document and asks, "What would happen to our profits if we wrote off these bone-headed mistakes?" The troll's head explodes, "Pow!" The Boss asks, "And how about the worst-case scenario?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 14, 2003's comic on:


Tags #clutter meleon, #printed debris, #nest, #predator, #power to disguise

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Headline: The Cluttermeleon Lines His Nest with Printed Debris. An employee is carrying a large stack of papers nto a cubicle already filled with stacks of paper. Headline: A Predator Comes Out of His Lair. The Boss pokes his head out of his office. Headline: The Quick-Thinking Cluttermeleon Uses His Power of Disguise. The Boss looks into the messy cubicle. The employee is hidden underneath an extra high stack of paper.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 18, 2003's comic on:


Tags #actual question, #delivery, #fantasize, #imaginary one, #plastic casing, #ripping moustache, #two week

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Dilbert: Did you order the plastic casings I need? They take two weeks for delivery. DIlbert: I see that you've cleverly avoided my actual question in favor of an imaginary one involving delivery times. Now Im fantasizing about ripping off your mustache and using it to shine your head. I hear that a lot.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 12, 2004's comic on:


Tags #need approval, #exhausted, #bored, #head ache, #business travel

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Dilbert: "I need your approval to.." "... Be exhausted, bored, stiff, headachy, annoyed and constipated for the next three days." "Also known as 'business travel.'" The Boss: "I must be traveling right now!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 15, 2004's comic on:


Tags #over head storage, #anxiety, #doesn't fit, #baggae, #luggae, #army on, #above seat, #iowa, #airplane

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Dilbert: GAAA!!! Im having overhead storage anxiety!! It doesn't fit! Everyone will hate me for delaying the flight! Flight attendant: We ere scheduled to fly to new york, but thanks to the bag that didn't fit, we have to leave in Iowa.