Ted Comic Strips - Page 44

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

448 Results for Ted

View 431 - 440 results for ted comic strips. Discover the best "Ted" comics from Dilbert.com.

Ted The First Gay And Disabled Person

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Ted The First Gay And Disabled Person - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business ethics, managers & supervisors, business, disabled, token, gay, homosexual, celebrate, employment

View Transcript

Transcript

boss: ted, the company wants to celebrate you as the first disabled gay person to hold this job. ted: but... i'm neither gay nor disabled. boss: the celebration is next week, so you have plenty of time to fix that.

Cake For Ted

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Cake For Ted - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business, office workers, cake, conference, birthday, invite, sarcasm

View Transcript

Transcript

wally: we're having cake in the conference room for ted's birthday. dilbert: i don't like ted. wally: no one does. we didn't invite him. dilbert: then why are we having an event for him? wally: we like cake?

Gaming The System

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Gaming The System - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business, decision, managers & supervisors, sarcasm, technology, wrong, believe, system, project

View Transcript

Transcript

boss: ted says you are making all the wrong technology decisions on your project. dilbert: why do you believe him? boss: because he's the last person i talked to. dilbert: but now you're talking to me. boss: stop trying to game the system.

Alice Compliments Ted

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Alice Compliments Ted - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business, comparison, project, job, great, dread, foreboding, generous, trap, lull, sabotage, career, monster

View Transcript

Transcript

alice: you did a great job on your project ted. ted: thank you. alice: you are most welcome. ted: wait. why do i have a sense of dread and foreboding? it isn't like you to give out generous compliments. this feels like a trap. you're lulling me into a false sense of security. you plan to sabotage my career to make yourself look better by comparison. ted yelling: you monster! boss: what's this all about? alice thinking: that worked out.

Feedback To Boss

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Feedback To Boss - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business, managers & supervisors, feedback, performance, boss, trap, constructive, criticism, perfect, almost, anger, honest

View Transcript

Transcript

boss: ted, i want your honest feedback on how i'm doing as your boss. ted: this feels like a trap. boss: not at all! i love constructive criticism! ted: i think you're almost perfect. boss yelling: almost?

Office Nickname

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Office Nickname - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business, technology, cell phone, nickname, office, insulting, approval, bad, start, permission

View Transcript

Transcript

dilbert video call on cell phone. dilbert: should i call you ted, or do you prefer your office nickname? i only ask because your nickname is insulting, so i just wanted to make sure you were okay with me using it. ted: i have an office nickname? dilbert thinking: aaand we're off to a bad start.

Project Is Not Feasible

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Project Is Not Feasible - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business, technology, video call, project, plan, feasible, back stab, defend, laptop, cell phone, competition

View Transcript

Transcript

boss and dilbert on video call. boss: i just talked to ted, and he says your project plan is not feasible. dilbert: i think you mean he mischaracterized my plan and then stabbed me in the back when i wasn't there to defend it. boss: he said you'd say that.

Ted Is Great But Not Enough

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Ted Is Great But Not Enough  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business, comparison, managers & supervisors, performance, employment, exceptional, fired, universe, sense, complain, reverse psychology

View Transcript

Transcript

boss: ted, your performance this year has been exceptional. but everyone else was even better, so...you're fired. ted: in what universe does that even make sense? boss: you also complain too much.

Management Potential

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Management Potential - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business, business ethics, managers & supervisors, stealing, credit, potential, chart

View Transcript

Transcript

boss reading paper: that's a great chart, ted. dilbert: actually, i made that chart a month ago, and ted stole it without giving me credit. boss to catbert: ted has management potential.

Ted Will Train You

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Ted Will Train You - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business, managers & supervisors, training, absence, coffee, helpful, problem, successful, sarcasm

View Transcript

Transcript

boss: ask ted to show you how to do his job functions before he leaves for his new job. panel changes to office building. dilbert: what if he isn't helpful? boss: then i'll fire you for failing. panel changes back in office: dilbert: do you see any problem with the approach? boss: no. it's worked for years.