Managers Comic Strips - Page 44

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596 Results for Managers

View 431 - 440 results for managers comic strips. Discover the best "Managers " comics from Dilbert.com.

Dogbert In The Cloud

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Dogbert In The Cloud   - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business, managers & supervisors, personal, information, cloud, safe, worry, trust, manage, system, browser, history

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boss: i'm concerned that storing my personal information in the cloud is not safe. dilbert: don't be such a worrier. i'm sure we can trust the people who manage those systems to keep us safe. somewhere in the cloud dogbert: hee-hee! look at the browser history on this bunion-having loser.

Hiring Morons

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Hiring Morons - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags managers & supervisors, technology, business, technical, job, market, hire, moron, critical

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boss: the job market is so hot right now that we can only afford to hire morons. dilbert: how will we fill our critical technical jobs? boss: i just told you.

Hiring Morons And Ted

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Hiring Morons And Ted - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business, managers & supervisors, labor, market, hire, moron, position, ted talk, video, smart

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boss: the labor market is so tight that i had to hire a moron just to fill a position. my plan is to make him watch ted talk videos until he smartens up. dilbert: how many will it take? boss: with any luck, fifteen to seventeen will get it done.

Ted Talks Might Take Your Job

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Ted Talks Might Take Your Job - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business, managers & supervisors, social media, technology, instagram, ted talks, smart, moron

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boss: the moron i hired keeps watching ted talks and getting smarter. he's only about three ted talks away from taking your job. ceo: there must be a way to slow him down. boss: i'll see if i can interest him in instagram.

Elbonian Factory Problem

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Elbonian Factory Problem - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business, managers & supervisors, report, factory, elbonia, problem, lost, power, main, floor, employees, scared, trip, dark, gas, line, accident, crater, capital, explosion, unsympathetic

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dilbert: we have some problems in our elbonian factory. boss: how bad? dilbert: they lost power on the main floor. boss: that's not so bad. dilbert: the employees were scared. boss: they'll get over it. dilbert: one of them tripped in the dark. boss: big deal. dilbert: he accidentally opened a gas line. boss: a little gas never hurt anyone. dilbert: now there's a crater where the capital city used to be. boss and dilbert just looking at each other boss: let's keep an eye on that.

I Will Send You A List

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I Will Send You A List - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business, managers & supervisors, technology, target, complicated, detail, list

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wally: and i plan to meet my targets by doing a variety of complicated things. boss: what kind of things? wally: i'll send you a detailed list. boss: what if you forget to send it? wally: with any luck, you'll forget you asked for it.

The Secret To Managing

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The Secret To Managing - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags managers & supervisors, business, manager, hire, people, smart, steal, success, rumor, job

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boss to catbert: the secret to being a great manager is hiring people who are smarter than you are. then you have to take credit for their successes so they don't take your job. i also find it helpful to start rumors that they steal.

Alice's Brain Is Full

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Alice's Brain Is Full - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business, managers & supervisors, brain, full, memory, work

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boss: why aren't you working? alice: my brain is full. boss: i'll check back later. alice: i won't remember you.

Tina Sues Boss

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Tina Sues Boss - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business, managers & supervisors, lawyer, sexist, jokes, not, Funny, illegal, unfunny, criminally, last, know

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tina: i've contacted my lawyer to sue you for your sexist jokes. your humor is not funny, and there's a good chance it is illegal. boss to catbert: i just learned that i am criminally not funny. catbert: you're always the last to know.

Working On Vacation

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Working On Vacation - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business, managers & supervisors, work, vacation, scold, enjoy, behind, train, broken

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dilbert: do you mind if i come to work on my vacation days? i hate being scolded for being behind in my work more that i enjoy taking vacations. boss: it seems i have trained you well. dilbert: no, i'm just broken.