Whats On Ground Comic Strips - Page 44

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

450 Results for Whats On Ground

View 431 - 440 results for whats on ground comic strips. Discover the best "Whats On Ground" comics from Dilbert.com.

Dogbert The Loan Shark

Thank you for voting.
Dogbert The Loan Shark   - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 12, 2017's comic on:


Tags #loan, #loan shark, #money, #racket, #interest

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: I need a loan to finance my professional gambling. Dogbert: That sounds like an excellent idea. I charge 40 percent interest per day, and I'll kill you for missing a payment. Boss: What's the catch? Dogbert: I'm also an identity thief.

Cracked Screen

Thank you for voting.
Cracked Screen  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 26, 2017's comic on:


Tags #phone, #cell phone, #fragile, #design, #screen, #case, #technology

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Introducing our new mobile phone product, the BSB 100. BSB stands for Beautiful, Slippery, and Brittle. Oops. Voice: What's the 100 stand for? Dilbert: That's how many times you'll have to replace a cracked screen.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 21, 2018's comic on:


Tags #address, #address of meeting, #anger, #driving, #gps, #inattentive, #lost, #meeting, #naviagte, #navigation system, #snap, #using phone, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Whats the address for our meeting? The Boss: You don't need it. I'll tell you where to turn, Dilbert: With all due respect you are not a reliable navigation system. You will be using your phone and you will forget to tell me when to turn. Dilbert: If I point out your inattentiveness you will snap at me,. Dilbert: I wil be seething with anger for the entire drive, while wondering if I am already lost and don't know it. or you could tell me the address now. The boss: You don't need it. I'll tell you when to turn. AN HOUR LATER Dilbert: must... not drive...over...cliff....

Unforseen Problems

Thank you for voting.
Unforseen Problems - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 22, 2018's comic on:


Tags #building apps, #completion date, #problems, #unforseen

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: It will take four weeks to build the app, unless there are unforeseen problems. how often do we have unforeseen problems? Dilbert: One hundred percent of the time. Then whats the point of estimating a completion date? Dilbert: I was hoping to make you stop talking but t dint work.

Money Can't Buy Happiness

Thank you for voting.
Money Can't Buy Happiness  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 03, 2018's comic on:


Tags #happiness, #work, #motivation, #meaning, #money, #raise, #wages, #excuses, #psychology

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I want a raise. Boss: Money can't buy happiness. Dilbert: Then why do people work? Boss: To avoid unhappiness. Dilbert: What's my best-case scenario here? Boss: I'll motivate you toward a neutral, zombie-like existence.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 13, 2018's comic on:


Tags #berating, #yelling, #gaslight, #temper, #anger, #frustration

View Transcript

Transcript

Asok: What's that gadget? Woman: Are you freakin' serious? Asok: Yes. Woman: Oh... My... God. Do you not remember the long discussion about this thing in the last meeting? Are you trying to gaslight me? I have not patience for trolls! Eat dirt and die! Asok: I joined the project today. This is my first meeting. Woman: Liar! Dilbert: Welcome to the team.

Dating A Skeleton

Thank you for voting.
Dating A Skeleton - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 05, 2018's comic on:


Tags #sex, #dating, #relationships, #questioning, #desperation

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Do you mind if I ask you a personal question? Skeleton: Go ahead. But if you ask me if I'm dead, there is no chance I'll be rattling bones with you later. What's your question? Dilbert: It can wait until tomorrow.

Good Day At Work

Thank you for voting.
Good Day At Work - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 08, 2018's comic on:


Tags #work, #morale, #engagment, #boredom, #anger, #frustration

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert: How's work? Dilbert: On a good day, the frustration and anger solve for the boredom. Dogbert: What's a bad day like? Dilbert: Same as a good day but with more questions.

Wally Mentors To Death

Thank you for voting.
Wally Mentors To Death - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 27, 2018's comic on:


Tags #asok, #Wally, #successful, #definition, #minimum, #alive, #employed, #comas, #ruling

View Transcript

Transcript

Asok: Have you ever mentored anyone who went on to be successful? Wally: Depends on your definition of success. Asok: Well, at minimum, they'd need to be alive and gainfully employed. Wally: What's your ruling on comas?

Introducing The New Hire

Thank you for voting.
Introducing The New Hire - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 31, 2018's comic on:


Tags #the boss, #new hire, #names, #introduction

View Transcript

Transcript

The New Hire New Hire: Can you take me around the office and introduce me? The Boss: No, that scheme won't work because it requires me to admit I don't know most of their names. New Hire: What's my name? The Boss: Um... Does it start with a letter?