Company Comic Strips - Page 45
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Character
882 Results for Company
View 441 - 450 results for company comic strips. Discover the best "Company" comics from Dilbert.com.
Wednesday September 08,
2004
Tags single source vendor, job offer, vp title, waiting eriod
Transcript
The boss: Okay, I convinced my company to make you our single source vendor. I assume you'll be make me a job offer now. any vp title will be fine. I'll just take an empty office. There ...is...a...waiting period!!
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marketing, project, cloud, catbert, leadership, budget, birthday, engineer, time sheet, sales, wally, strategy, dogbert, powerpoint, project management, topper, leader, boss, change, meeting, data, management, mordac
Saturday September 11,
2004
Tags security guard, company owned assets, under clothes, smuggled out, pilferage
Transcript
whoa! whoa! where do you think you're going? you look bloated today as if you have company -owned assets under your clothes. I need to stop relying on my instincts.
Tuesday September 21,
2004
Tags brown bag seminars, ethical, ethics problems, seminar
Transcript
The Boss: The company will be holding a series of brown bag seminars on corporate ethics. Dilbert:is it ethical to steal our lunch hour and pretend that the ethics problems sent come from our executives? The Boss: I wouldn't know because I haven't taken the seminar.
Wednesday September 22,
2004
Tags dental evidence, hired manager, the hotline, ethics questions, ethics manager
Transcript
The Boss: "The company has hired an manager." "If you have any ethics questions, call the hotline." Dogbert: "That's fine, as long as you get rid of the dental evidence."
Thursday September 23,
2004
Tags ethics hotline, naughty thoughts, work hours, lost productivity, reimburse comapny, fortune, too honest, self imposing
Transcript
Ethics hotline This is dogcart. Please state your conundrum. Asok: sometimes I have naughty thoughts during work hours should I reimburse the company for lost productivity? Asok: Dang! Thi is costing me a fortune!
Thursday November 11,
2004
Tags pleasure seeking orons, shard filled donuts, delicious, 40 thousand caloire
Transcript
"My company is selling gigantic, shard-filled doughnuts with forty thousand calories apiece." "It's based on Dogbert's theory that people are pleasure-seeking morons." "How does it taste?" "Delicious! I have one for you strapped to my car"
Saturday November 13,
2004
Tags immoral to sell, 40 thousand, shard filled donuts, forcing anyone, irrestibibly delcious
Transcript
Dilbert: "Is it immoral for my company to sell forty-thousand calorie, shard-filled doughnuts?" Dogbert: "You're not forcing anyone to eat them; you're just making them irresistibly delicious." Dilbert: "How's that different?" Dogbert: "Bah!"
Wednesday November 24,
2004
Tags email, face on cows butt, morale, objects, off color jokes, photoshopped
Transcript
The boss: "Alice, you've ben accused of forwarding off-color jokes by e-mail." The Boss: "Do you object to the increase in morale or the nickel it cost the company so far?" "I object to my face being photoshopped to a cow's butt." Alice: "You object to art?"
Friday December 03,
2004
Tags become irreplaceable, escaped felon, gain trust, biggest cutsomers
Transcript
Wall: "I need to become irreplaceable so I can't be fired for my behavior." "I'll gain the trust of our biggest customer so they'll only deal with me." "I probably shouldn't say this, but everyone in my company except me is an escaped felon."
Friday December 10,
2004
Tags indeispoensible, comapny, outrageously annoying, pretty annoying, crushed ice chomping
Transcript
I've decided to become indispensible to the company. "Indispensible employees can get away with outrageously annoying behavior." "You're already pretty annoying." "I've been reading up on crushed ice chomping."

