Lying Down Comic Strips - Page 45

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View 441 - 450 results for lying down comic strips. Discover the best "Lying Down" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags mandatory class, windows, training, teacher doesn't know, no computers, uses box, teeth as keyboard

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Tim stands at the front of the room. He says, "Welcome to the mandatory Windows NT class." Ted points to an easel with the words "Two weeks" written on it. "Personally, I've only been using a computer for...how long? Anyone?" Ted continues, "But a good trainer can teach any subject." Ted raises his hands over his head and says, "Okay, everyone stand up and stretch!" Ted continues to hold his arms over his head and says, "Or sit there and glare at me. That's good too." Ted holds a box upside down and says, "I forgot to reserve the room with the computers, so I'll use this box." Ted continues, "...and let's say this eraser is the moose." Dilbert sits with Dogbert on the couch and says, "I left when he told us to use our teeth as a keyboard." Dogbert says, "Ooh-yah."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags barger, closed dorr, curse, intense enrgy, new hire, not a knocker, pushes

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Tina charges down the hallway pushing people out of her way. Tina says, "Get out of my way, weaklings!" Tina stands in front of the boss' closed door. Tina screams, "This closed door can't stop me! I'll curse it off its #%@!! hinges!" Ann stands on top of the boss's door which has fallen into the Boss's office. There is a person flattened beneath it. The boss looks shocked. The Boss says, "You could have knocked." Ann says, "I'm a barger, not a knocker."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags mordac, preventer if info services, y2k demon, not big, imagined bigger, cute, giant foot, y2k, fear, scared, culture, unknown

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Mordac stands in front of a shaking computer. Mordac says, "I am Mordac, the preventer of information services! I summon the Y2K demon!" A little tadpole like demon bursts out of the computer screen. Mordac says, "You're not as big as I imagined. I wonder why everyone is so afraid." Mordac holds the demon. Mordac says, "Cute!" A huge claw comes down to pick him up.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags weasel, store clerk, never settle, lesser of two weasels

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Dilbert: Its nice , but the weasel down the street is selling it for less. Weasel: You should never settle for the lesser of two weasels. Dilbert: Now that you mention it, it did seem too convenient.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags combined birthdays, birthdays last year, fake cake, one cake, all birthdays, sing happy birthday

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The Boss stands in front of a cake and says, "Happy combined birthdays." The Boss continues, "Today we honor the employees who had birthdays within the past year." Wally, Dilbert and Alice stand as the Boss continues, "That's Dilbert...Alice...Asok...did I miss anyone?" Wally raises his hand and says, "Umm...you missed me." The Boss says, "You too? That's spooky." The Boss continues, "I'd cut the cake, but it's a plastic prop." The Boss says, "Let's sing. Does anyone know the words to 'Happy Birthday'?" The Boss walks down the hallway with the fake cake under his arm, and thinks, "I bet those weren't even the real words."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags motivational message, employees, first day, rest of the week, business

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The boss sits at his desk. He speaks into a PA system but the handset is held upside down. The Boss says, "This is today's motivational message for all employees." The Boss says, "Today is the first day of the rest of the week." The Boss thinks, "Or is it?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags launch sequence, lift off, cubicle in space, near moon

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Dogbert and Dilbert are strapped down in Dilbert's cubicle. Dogbert says, "Initiate launch sequence." The cubicle takes off revealing rocket boosters underneath it. Dogbert says, "We have liftoff." The cubicle floats near the surface of the moon. Dilbert says. "I keep waiting for this to seem like a bad idea."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags best things in life, rat, silly, garbageman, garbage, rat jumps

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Ratbert stands on a garbage can. Garbage Man collects the garbage. Ratbert says, "Do you mind if I jump on the garbage?" Ratbert says, "I don't know why, but when I see a fresh pile of garbage, I just want to jump up and down on it." Ratbert jumps on the garbage and screams, "Yee-ha!!" Garbage Man thinks, "The best things in life are silly." Garbage Man smiles.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags sales man, vendor, offcie, fake personality, buy stuff, blue things, so dumb

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Dilbert sits at a conference table with a salesperson. Dilbert says, "...And we'll buy a dozen of these. We're trying to spend our budget so it doesn't get cut next year." The salesperson says, "This is great! You guys are so dumb that I don't even have to use my fake personality to make the sale!" Dilbert says, "...And nine of these blue things." Salesperson turns away and pulls his pants down. The salesperson says, "There's a full moon on the horizon!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags hallway, boss, Dilbert, tissue, write down, rips, ink blot, mishandled, ignored

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Dilbert says to the Boss, "I need some management fire power." Dilbert begins explaining to the Boss, "The VP of marketing says we can't use the vendor we selected." The Boss fumbles in his pocket and says, "Let me write this down." Dilbert asks, "Do you want some paper?" The Boss replies, "No, I'll just use this tissue...oops." Dilbert continues, "Anyway, the other vendor can't deliver." The Boss continues to make a bess of the tissue. He says, "Oops." Dilbert stops and says, "I have some note paper." The Boss continues, making a mess, saying, "No, this is fine. Oops." Dilbert says, "All you have is a blotch on a scrap." The Boss replies, "It's more of a reminder than a detailed note." The Boss sits at his desk with several little scraps of paper spread out before him. He thinks, "Hmmm...It's not so useful when I put it with the others."