New York Harbor Comic Strips - Page 45
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1000 Results for New York Harbor
View 441 - 450 results for new york harbor comic strips. Discover the best "New York Harbor" comics from Dilbert.com.
Saturday August 02,
2008
Tags new cubilces, boss, coworkers, picked one, anything changed
Transcript
Dilbert says, "I've been away from work so long, I wonder if anything has changed." The Boss says, "You weren't here when we moved to new cubicles so your coworkers picked one for you."
Monday July 21,
2008
Tags moral compass, healed, position of power, narrow gap, executive pay, worker pay
Transcript
Dilbert says, "My moral compass has healed. Can I keep my new job in management?" Dilbert says, "I'd like to use my position of power to narrow the gap between executive and worker pay."
Saturday July 19,
2008
Tags new job, miserable and helpless, Women, attracted to men, salary ranges, trophy wives, carnival skanks
Transcript
Dilbert's moral compass is damaged. Dilbert says, "My new job is to make employees feel miserable and helpless." Dilbert says, "Here's a chart that shows the sort of women that are attracted to men at various salary ranges." Dilbert says, "Trophy wives are at the top, obviously, and down in your range we have the carnival skanks."
Saturday May 24,
2008
Tags churn butter, needs, next budget cycle, not in budget, broken computer
Transcript
Dilbert says, "My computer is broken. I need a new one." The Boss says, "We don't have the budget." The Boss says, "Do things that don't require a computer until the next budget cycle." Dilbert says, "Like churning my own butter?" The Boss says, "You make it sound creepy."
Sunday May 11,
2008
Tags file emailed, viewer application, upgrade, operating system, new one, corrupted files
Transcript
"Wally, I can't open that file you e-mailed." "Sounds like you need to upgrade your viewer application." "Which means you'll probably have to upgrade your operating system." "You'd better add some ram while you're at it." "But it probably makes no sense to upgrade your old computer. This is a good time to get a new one." "How do I get a new computer?" "It's easy. I'll send you a file that explains it." "Are you sending corrupted files to people again?" "Only if I think they deserve it."
Saturday May 03,
2008
Tags new guy, project team, foul stench, stink of failure, follows man
Transcript
Man says, "You must be Dilbert. I'm the new guy on your project team." Dilbert says, "What's that foul stench?" Man says, "It's the stink of failure. It follows me around from project to project." Dilbert says, "How do I get if off?!!" Man says, "You can dilute it by shaking hands."
Thursday April 24,
2008
Tags strategic alternatives, company for sale, new corporate overlords, employment vandalism
Transcript
The Boss says, "The company has decided to explore strategic alternatives." Dilbert says, "Is that another way to say the company is for sale and we'll all be fired by our new corporate overlords?" The Boss says, "What answer will spark the least employee vandalism?"
Tuesday April 01,
2008
Tags coffe maker, aggressive, machine, contraption, big, metal, fierce, ridiculous
Transcript
Wally: You must be the new coffee machine. Thoop! It's aggressive, but I like that in my coffee makers."
Monday March 31,
2008
Tags coffee maker, meeting, not enough money, raise, too much, budget, business
Transcript
The boss: I'd like to give you a raise but I used the entire budget on a new coffee maker. It's a nice one.There's talk that I paid too much for you."
Wednesday March 12,
2008
Tags pronouned hay-soos, fixed eye sight, hair regrow, 40 shares, punch pilot light, ceo, team organizer
Transcript
Pronounced Hay-soos. Wally: The new team leader, Jesus, is gaining quite a following." He fixed my eyesight and made my hair regrow. I think he wants your job as CEO. For forty shares of stock, I could point him out at lunch. CEO: I'll punch his pilot light out!"


