Managers Comic Strips - Page 46
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Character
596 Results for Managers
View 451 - 460 results for managers comic strips. Discover the best "Managers" comics from Dilbert.com.
Saturday June 27,
2020
Credible Data
Tags managers & supervisors, sarcasm, technology, credible, data, problem, test, good
Transcript
alice: i finished the data throughput tests, but the results are not credible because of a problem with the test. boss: does the non-credible data make us look good? alice: yes. boss: our name for that kind of data is "credible."
Monday June 29,
2020
Cooties In Elbonia
Tags cooties, deny, elbonia, managers & supervisors, outbreak, science, symptom, technology, news
Transcript
boss: the news says there's a major outbreak of cooties in elbonia. dilbert: i don't think cooties is a real thing. boss: experts say one of the symptoms of cooties is "denying science."
Sunday July 05,
2020
Tracking Dilbert
Tags body cam, freedom, keystrokes, location, managers & supervisors, phone, report, status, technology, track, video conference, work at home, working
Transcript
dilbert: maybe i could permanently work at home. boss: on video conference: no problem. i just need a few things from you to make sure you are working. dilbert: such as? boss: well. obviously, i need frequent status reports. dilbert: sounds reasonable. boss: and i'll need to track your keystrokes and your phone's location. dilbert: wow. well, okay. i guess i can get used to that in return for my freedom to work at home. boss: now that I've loosened you up. let's talk about fitting you for a body cam.
Tuesday July 07,
2020
Refusing Works
Tags managers & supervisors, office workers, refuse, stupid, power, leash, head, sarcasm
Transcript
dilbert: yesterday i refused to do something i had been asked to do because it was stupid. and it worked out fine. wally: don't let the power go to your head. dilbert doing happy dance: i am off the leash! continued...
Wednesday July 08,
2020
No To Pie Chart
Tags managers & supervisors, pandemic, technology, pie chart, line graph, stupid, insubordination, covid, face mask
Transcript
boss and dilbert wearing face masks boss: put this on a pie chart instead of a line graph. dilbert: no, that's stupid. i'm not going to do that. boss: oh. okay. dilbert: why is this working? continued...
Saturday July 11,
2020
First Time For Everything
Tags amazing, business, business plan, concept, first time, good, managers & supervisors, new, pandemic, face mask, covid
Transcript
boss and wally wearing face masks. boss: why should we do what you are suggesting when literally no one has ever tried it before? wally: because everything good and amazing had to be done by someone for the first time. boss: will this be good and amazing? wally: let's keep this on the concept level.
Sunday July 12,
2020
Wally Took Notes
Tags business, co-workers, forward, hungry, insults, intelligence, managers & supervisors, meeting, notes, pandemic, release, schedule, snack, technology, version, covid
Transcript
staff in conference room and all wearing face masks. dilbert: we agreed at our last meeting to postpone the version release. tina: no, we agreed to do it sooner. dilbert: i don't think so. who took notes at the last meeting? wally: i did. click wally: forwarding those notes to each of you. dilbert: um...your notes are mostly insults about the intelligence of your co-workers and...some sort of snack list. this is no help at all. wally: don't blame me. i'm not the one who schedules these meetings when i'm hungry.
Monday July 13,
2020
Boss Is White Supremacist
Tags business, complaint, covid, denial, envy, managers & supervisors, members, pandemic, staff, system, white supremacist
Transcript
catbert: members of your staff have complained that you are a white supremacist. boss wearing face mask: but...i'm not. catbert: that's not for you to decide. boss: who gets to decide? catbert: people who want your job. it's not a perfect system.
Tuesday July 14,
2020
Boss Follows Racists On Twitter
Tags business, covid, follow, managers & supervisors, pandemic, proof, racists, reports, staff, twitter, white supremacist
Transcript
ceo: i'm getting reports from your staff that you're a white supremacist. boss wearing face mask and drinking coffee: but i'm not. ceo: we have proof because you follow racists on twitter. boss: what makes you think they are racists? ceo: because they follow you on twitter.
Wednesday July 15,
2020
Boss Fired For Being White Supremacist
Tags business, managers & supervisors, racism, fired, employees, white supremacist, apathy, career, punch, witness, denial
Transcript
ceo: i have to fire you because employees are saying you are a white supremacist. boss: but i'm not. ceo: doesn't matter. i care more about my career than your life. boss: you're firing me just to look good? ceo: and i'll need to punch you in front of witnesses.


