Technology Comic Strips - Page 46

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

803 Results for Technology

View 451 - 460 results for technology comic strips. Discover the best "Technology" comics from Dilbert.com.

Click Rate On Death Alerts

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Click Rate On Death Alerts - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags advertising, technology, analytics, smart watch, app, ad, click, clickbait, attention, distraction

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Our health app accurately predicts the user's time of death and sends a five-minute warning. Our business model is paid advertising that we disguise as "death alerts." CEO: How's the click-through rate? Boss: Surprisingly low. It's hard to get people's attention these days.

Health Sensor Predictes Death

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Health Sensor Predictes Death - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags invention, success, technology, health monitor, fitbit, smart watch, heart, heart rate, death, medical

View Transcript

Transcript

Ted: The health sensors you built into our smart watch prototype aren't working. According to your stupid sensors, my heart is going to stop beating in... Dilbert: Yay me!

Brainstorming App Ideas

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Brainstorming App Ideas - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags ideas, brainstorm, idea, thinking, criticism, judge, judging, technology, invention, judgment, legal

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Today we will brainstorm app ideas for our smart watch. The only rule is "no judging." Wally: How about an app that makes you left-handed. Are you judging me now or were you being insincere before.

Doomed Smartwatch Project

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Doomed Smartwatch Project - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags analogy, obliviousness, assignment, technology, invention, watch, failure

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: You'll be in charge of our smart watch project. Dilbert: ...that is doomed from the start. Boss: Stop being such a pessimist. Dilbert: Said General Custer to his horse. Boss: Why would he talk to his horse? Dilbert: Because even the horse knew something was wrong!

Maybe We Should Make A Smartwatch

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Maybe We Should Make A Smartwatch - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags technology, innovation, copy, practicality, practical, pragmatic, watch, competition

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Maybe we should make a smart watch. Dilbert: Maybe it is far too late. Boss: Maybe we could make a better one than Apple. Dilbert: Maybe we should get in a sword fight and not have a sword. Boss: Am I missing anything by not listening to what you say? Dilbert: No, it's mostly for my own entertainment.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags internet, types of people, internet comment, Opinion, discussion, fame, technology

View Transcript

Transcript

Man: I'm Dick, from the Internet. I'm the guy who always says ridiculous, angry stuff. I misinterpret every comment you make as an absurd absolute and then I attack it like you are a moron. Dilbert: That doesn't sound fun. Dick: Wow. So you are saying everything in the world needs to be fun. Maybe you should do some research before you embarrass yourself like that again. Dilbert: Hey! You are the guy from the Internet! Dick: I'm sending you five links that are not as relevant as I think they are. Dilbert: You're famous!

Boss And Social Media

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Boss And Social Media - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags social media, twitter, facebook, passion, deception, trick, prank, obliviousness, technology

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: I don't get social media. How do I get followers? Wally: Easy. People care about passion. Find something you hate and write about it. Boss: Well, I don't like children. Wally: Perfect. And don't hold back.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags flirting, dating, negotiation, rebuff, rejection, social media, relationships, technology

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: My name is Dilbert. Would you like to make out? Woman: No. Dilbert: Can I take you on a date? Woman: No. Dilbert: Lunch? Woman: No. Dilbert: Can I have your number so I can text you? Woman: No. Dilbert: Can I be your Facebook friend? Woman: No. Dilbert: Can I follow you on Twitter? Woman: Fine. But no retweeting. Dilbert: Can I favorite your tweets? Woman: Only if you wear a glove on your mouse hand.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags dating, social, social interaction, honesty, politeness, overshare, relationships

View Transcript

Transcript

Woman: So, tell me a little about yourself, and be totally honest. Dilbert: Totally honest? Okay... I like technology more than I like people. I don't believe in free will, soulmates, or following my passion. I think life is a brief, meaningless event in a random universe that doesn't care. I only associate with other people because I have biological and economical needs. I think all human actions are driven by selfishness. Woman: Uh... okay. Do you have any questions for me? Dilbert: Am I still being totally honest or should I act curious?

Brain Scan And 3 D Scanner

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Brain Scan And 3 D Scanner - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags replication, technology, clone, playing god, doppelganger

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: My invention can scan the human brain and duplicate it in software. I combined that technology with a 3-D printer that makes human body parts. Boss: What does it all do? Replicant: He's getting to the good part.