boss on video conference with dilbert and wally.
boss: it's challenging to manage employees who are working remotely.
dilbert sitting in arm chair listening
boss: so i hired a stalker to look in the windows at your homes and tell me what he sees. he lasted on day.
wally sitting in chair wearing shorts and no shirt:
sorry. that's on me.
Dilbert yelling: dogbert! can you keep down the noise while i'm on zoom!
dogbert standing on chair: i'm on a zoom call too. your call isn't more important than mine!
dilbert speaking to his laptop: sorry, i can't stop the background noise.
dogbert yelling from another room: can you keep it down in there? i'm on a zoom call.
boss on video call.
boss: i'm proud to announce we reduced workplace injuries by 76% this past year.
voice from laptop: we all worked from home this year. shouldn't we have seen a 100% reduction?
boss: our security guard kept hurting his back stealing office equipment.