Pay Close Attention Comic Strips - Page 47

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465 Results for Pay Close Attention

View 461 - 465 results for pay close attention comic strips. Discover the best "Pay Close Attention" comics from Dilbert.com.

Audit Blackmail

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Audit Blackmail - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business ethics, #business, #audit, #software, #blackmail, #free, #network, #money, #dollars

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dogbert: my audit of your company has uncovered a number of software vulnerabilities. for example, a blackmailer could take control of your network and make you pay a billion dollars to get it back. ceo: good work. what do we owe you? dogbert: the audit is free. i only did it to find ways to blackmail you.

Loud Using Zoom

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Loud Using Zoom - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #technology, #zoom, #mortgage, #loud, #noise, #calls, #war, #blackmail, #surprise, #laptop, #imagine

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dogbert: can you please stop talking so loudly on your zoom calls?!!! dilbert at home in front of laptop: i'm sorry, but i pay the mortgage, and i have a right to make as much noise as i want in my own house. dogbert: oh, wow. did you really play the "mortgage card" on me? dogbert: this is war! wait until you see what i do in the background of your next zoom call. i don't want to ruin the surprise, but think of the number-one worst thing you can imagine me doing. are you picturing it in your mind? it's bad isn't it? now imagine at the same time i also start doing the second-worst thing you can imagine. dilbert: noooo!!!!

Pretending To Listen

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Pretending To Listen - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #managers & supervisors, #technology, #laptop, #pretending, #listening, #camera, #look, #zoom, #anger, #video call, #boss, #easy, #golden age

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boss on video call. boss: some of you are only pretending to be paying attention to this zoom call. boss yelling: you're still doing it! stop it! look into the camera!!! dilbert at home. dilbert: pretending to listen to your boss has never been easier. dogbert: golden age!

Wally Works At Home Unsafely

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Wally Works At Home Unsafely - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #technology, #warning, #unsafe, #workplace, #work at home, #remote, #live, #judging, #personality, #toxic, #dump, #lazy, #clean, #lucky, #guess, #neighbors, #curtains, #laptop

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wally on video call with catbert: catbert: i'm issuing you a warning for your unsafe workplace. wally: i work from home. you've never seen where i live. catbert: i'm judging by your personality. you're too lazy to clean anything up, so by now it's a toxic dump. wally: that's a lucky guess. catbert: and you're too lazy to close your curtains, so by now your neighbors want to murder you. wally: that's two lucky guesses.