Office Workers Comic Strips - Page 48
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Character
1000 Results for Office Workers
View 471 - 480 results for office workers comic strips. Discover the best "Office Workers" comics from Dilbert.com.
Friday June 02,
2017
Modular Workstations
Top Dilbert Searches
marketing, project, cloud, catbert, leadership, budget, birthday, engineer, time sheet, sales, wally, strategy, dogbert, powerpoint, project management, topper, leader, boss, change, meeting, data, management, mordac
Sunday May 07,
2017
Tags avoiding, avoidance, offense
Transcript
Tina; Are you going to the department meeting? Dilbert: Yes, as soon as I plan my route. I have seven co-workers who I need to avoid on the way. Three are nonstop talkers. The other four ask me for something every time I see them. I've mapped their likely locations and I'm working out an avoidance path. Yes, I think I can do it. Tina: Is that my name on your list of employees to avoid? Dilbert: I didn't say it was a perfect system.
Saturday April 29,
2017
Cublices Or Open Office Plan
Tags office, concept, cubicle, floorplan, laziness, hiding
Transcript
Dilbert: Do you prefer the privacy of a cubicle or the collaborative atmosphere of an open office plan? Wally: Cubicles poison my soul. But in an open office plan, I would not get any work done. Dilbert: So... which do you prefer? Wally: The one with no work. I thought that was obvious.
Friday April 21,
2017
Virtual Vr And Jail Program
Tags virtual reality, cubicle, office, torture
Transcript
Dilbert: As you requested, I wrote a VR program that makes users feel as if they are in cubicles. I put only your name on the credits because I expect an angry mob to kill whoever created it. I also wrote a VR jail program in case you want to be in protective custody. Boss: I might need that.
Thursday April 20,
2017
Vr Cubicle
Tags virtual reality, office, cubicle, fantasy, illusion
Transcript
Boss: We're going to use our VR technology to take over the cubicle business. Write a program that makes users feel as if they are working in a fabric-covered box. Dilbert: Maybe we should think outside the box. Boss: Stop resisting change.
Thursday April 06,
2017
Judging The Robot
Tags dating, robot, relationships, free will, personality, insult, psychology
Transcript
Dilbert: I hear you're dating our office robot. Alice: Stop judging me. Dilbert: I'm not judging you. Alice: Good. Dilbert: I'm judging the robot. Alice: Ouch.
Tuesday February 28,
2017
Wally's Political Views Make Others Uncomfortable
Tags comparison, gandhi, Politics, offense, offensive, sensitive, politically correct, political correctness
Transcript
Boss: Wally, your political opinions are making your co-workers uncomfortable. Wally: That is exactly what people said about Gandhi. Boss: You are nothing like Gandhi. Wally: Was he a little bald guy who didn't have a real job?
Sunday February 19,
2017
Tags space, cubicle, conference room, office, sharing, obstinacy
Transcript
Dilbert: I have this conference room booked for a meeting. Alice: This is my private office now. I took it over. Dilbert: You can't just take over a conference room. Alice: I already did. It was easy. Now all I need to do is act as if it would be totally unreasonable to ask me to leave. Dilbert: You need to leave. I have this room reserved. Alice: That's totally unreasonable! I'm all settled in and I'm working on a company-critical deadline! Dilbert: I guess I could cancel my meeting. Alice: Perfect. Now get out of my office.
Saturday December 31,
2016
Spreading Ted's Ashes
Sunday December 11,
2016
Tags health, morning, waking up, sleepless, complaining, manager, sociopath, emotions
Transcript
Boss: Can you take a call with our Elbonian customers at 6 a.m. tomorrow? Dilbert: Sure. All I need to do is put my health at risk by not getting enough sleep tonight. Of course, I'll hate your guts for making me come to work so early. And I would expect my bad attitude to infect my co-workers and make them less productive, too. My lack of sleep will affect my decision-making, obviously. And I"m working on important projects, so the ripple effect could be catastrophic. So, do you still want me to be here at 6 a.m. tomorrow? Boss: Yes. You don't have to be a sociopath to be a manager, but it helps.

