Work Comic Strips - Page 48
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1000 Results for Work
View 471 - 480 results for work comic strips. Discover the best "Work" comics from Dilbert.com.
Monday October 28,
2013
Tags cruelty, managers & supervisors, work ethic, employees work harder, caring managers, sausage casing, business
Transcript
Boss: According to studies, employees will work harder if they think their managers care about them. But that's hard for me because you're basically a sausage casing full of coffee and rotting organs. Dilbert: That must have stung. Wally: Less than you'd think.
Friday November 08,
2013
Tags gratitude, managers & supervisors, work ethic, great leadership, project, useful things, good work, greedy, business
Transcript
Boss: I'd like to thank myself for my great leadership on the project. Some of you did useful things, too, but only because I threatened to fire you if you didn't. So don't let it go to your heads. Catbert: I hope you didn't tell them they did good work. Boss: No, that makes them greedy.
Thursday December 05,
2013
Tags internet & world wide web, managers & supervisors, work ethic, facebook, work, home, unpaid work, business
Transcript
Boss: You're not allowed to use Facebook at work. Alice: Fine. I'll use it at home tonight instead of doing the three hours of unpaid work I was planning to do. Boss: I"m calling that a win.
Friday December 13,
2013
Tags discussion, executives, ignorance (knowledge), culture of innovation, less work, stop criticizing
Transcript
CEO: We need to foster a culture of innovation. Does anyone have an idea how we can do that? Dilbert: You could give us less work and you could stop criticizing every idea we have. CEO: Does anyone have a suggestion that isn't ridiculous?
Friday January 31,
2014
Tags incompetetnt, laziness, passive agressive, threatened me more, work ethic, realtionships, defensive, admits to incompetetnt
Transcript
Coworker: I can't tell if you're passive-aggressive or just incompetent. Wally: Which one sends a message that I could do good work if you threatened me more? Coworker: Passive-aggressive. Wally: Okay. I'm the other one.
Thursday February 13,
2014
Tags deception, language, managers & supervisors, key to leadership, vague golas, jargon, wishful thinking, dumping work, whine about goals, better system, business
Transcript
Boss: The key to leadership is setting vague goals that are a combination of jargon and wishful thinking. That way, I can keep dumping work on you without hearing you whine that it doesn't fit with your goals. You have to admit, my system is better than whatever you're doing over there. Dilbert: Yup.
Friday February 21,
2014
Tags balanced, hiding in plain sight, life balance, rewarding work, so genius, work ethic, secret to rewarding life, learning secrets
Transcript
Wally: The secret to having a rewarding work-life balance is to have no life. Then it's easy to keep things balanced by doing no work. Asok: So simple, and yet, so genius. Wally: It was hiding in plain sight.
Monday March 17,
2014
Tags work ethic, brain wash, company profits, more imprtant, employers engagement, 12 hour days, work for money
Transcript
Catbert: I'm going to brainwash you to believe company profits are more important than your health. It's called "employee engagement," and it will make you work 12-hour days while thinking you enjoy every minute of it. Dilbert: Can I just work for money? Catbert: Why are you being a jerk about this?
Friday March 21,
2014
Tags telecommunication lines, work ethic, studies show, telecommunters, survey people, lying weasles, level of awareness
Transcript
Wally: You should let me work at home a few days per week because studies show that telecommuters put in more hours. Boss: How do they study that sort of thing? Wally: They survey people who work at home. Boss: What if those people are lying weasels? Wally: I wasn't counting on this level of awareness.
Thursday March 27,
2014
Tags efficiency experts, stress, consultant, booze muhkidney, travel work, unhealthy food, total failure, sleepless nights, power point slides, business
Transcript
Consultant: All I do is travel, work, and eat unhealthy food. I'm a total failure at managing my own life, and yet people hire me for business advice. I haven't slept since October. Dilbert: I was told there would be PowerPoint slides. Consultant from Booze Muhkidney


