Managers Comic Strips - Page 49
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596 Results for Managers
View 481 - 490 results for managers comic strips. Discover the best "Managers " comics from Dilbert.com.
Wednesday August 19,
2020
Dilbert Is Sexist
Tags insult, managers & supervisors, office workers, fire, crazy, gender, true, false, anger, face mask
Transcript
tina: i want you to fire dilbert because he said i might be nuts. he wouldn't say that to a man. boss: he said the same thing to me last week. tina yelling: it doesn't count if it's true!
Thursday August 20,
2020
Study 5 G First
Tags managers & supervisors, technology, business, 5g, dangerous, study, research, reporter
Transcript
boss: dilbert, i need you to respond to this reporter who thinks our 5g technology is dangerous. dilbert: is it dangerous? boss: how would i know? dilbert: maybe i should study it first. boss: never mind. i'll ask someone else.
Sunday September 13,
2020
Applying Math To Guesses
Tags business ethics, managers & supervisors, employment, business, analysis, discount rate, installation, maintenance, project, technology, math, guess, sarcasm, face mask
Transcript
boss: how confident are you in your analysis? dilbert: very confident. boss: good. dilbert: unless i used the wrong discount rate, which is hard to know. boss: but otherwise, it's solid? dilbert: except for the installation and maintenance costs, which are wild guesses. and we don't know if we sized the project right, so costs could be double or triple. boss: it sounds as if you applied math to a bunch of wild guesses. dilbert: yes, but i got the result you wanted. boss: next time, just say that.
Sunday September 20,
2020
Silencer In Facemask
Tags bored, business, covid, face mask, hear, managers & supervisors, office workers, play, silencer, talk
Transcript
wally: i installed a silencer in our pointy-haired boss's face mask. now he's the only one who can hear himself talk, but he doesn't know it. here he comes. play along. boss has speech bubble with no words. boss's back is turned and has speech bubble with no words. wally: uh-huh. okay. thanks. and i can do the same thing to the face mask of anyone else who bores me. dilbert has speech bubble with no words. wally: uh-huh.
Monday August 24,
2020
Gaslighting The Boss
Tags managers & supervisors, month, november, october, birthday, family relations, wife, gaslight
Transcript
boss: what's the name of the month that comes after october? dilbert: november boss: that's what i thought. my wife is trying to gaslight me so she doesn't have to buy me a birthday present. dilbert: how long has she been doing that? boss: i thought i was 26 years old until just now.
Thursday August 27,
2020
Word Salad
Tags managers & supervisors, sarcasm, argument, implications, long term, ramifications, strategic, priorities, word salad, trigger, cognitive, dissonance, business, face mask
Transcript
boss: you think you made a good argument, but... you are failing to consider the overall implications of the long-term ramifications with regard to strategic priorities. dilbert: that big bowl of word salad suggests i triggered you into cognitive dissonance. boss: tuna carpet!
Monday August 31,
2020
No More Id Badges
Tags managers & supervisors, business, employment, i.d. badge, employees, freedom, tattoo, sarcasm, face mask
Transcript
boss: the company is considering no longer requiring employees to wear i.d. badges. asok yelling: yes! freedom! dilbert: too too. hold... hold... boss: ...in favor of permanent forehead tattoos. dilbert: always wait for the second part.
Thursday September 03,
2020
Boss Not Returning Messages
Tags managers & supervisors, office workers, business, boss, fire, message, importance, sarcasm, employment, face mask
Transcript
asok: our pointy-haired boss isn't returning my messages, do you think he plans to fire me? dilbert: no asok: phew! good. dilbert: you're just totally unimportant to him. asok: yes! that's where i want to be!
Monday September 07,
2020
Reasonable Doubt
Tags managers & supervisors, office workers, employees, health, leader, coronavirus, indoor, face mask, kill, doubt, sarcasm
Transcript
Carol: that stupid coronavirus is no match for a healthy, young leader such as yourself. freedom demands that you go to crowded indoor places without wearing your mask. boss: are you trying to kill me? carol: i'd say there's reasonable doubt.
Thursday September 10,
2020
Artificial Dumbness
Tags business, cell phone, managers & supervisors, technology, software, invention, artificial, dumb, human, face mask
Transcript
dilbert: my new software invention is called "artificial dumbness." it acts dumb so humans will think they are talking to one of their own. boss: that couldn't possibly work. dilbert's phone echos: that couldn't possibly work.

