Deliver Big Report Comic Strips - Page 49

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494 Results for Deliver Big Report

View 481 - 490 results for deliver big report comic strips. Discover the best "Deliver Big Report" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 16, 1989's comic on:


Tags #Dogbert, #Dilbert, #doors, #double doors, #fool, #ventilation ducts, #outside

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Dilbert walks down a hallway thinking, "Uh oh . . . Double doors. One side is always locked and I make a fool of myself trying to open it." Dilbert thinks, "Which side is it? Left? Right? People are watching. Think, think . . ." Dilbert arrives at home looking dirty and disheveled. Dilbert says to Dogbert, "That's when I noticed that the ventilation ducts were big enough for a human to crawl through." Dogbert says, "Too bad they didn't lead to outside."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 13, 1989's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #mugged, #police, #artist, #expression, #frightened

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Dilbert stands at a counter talking to a police officer. Dilbert, who has a bump on his head, says, "I was mugged, but I got a good look at him." The officer says, "I'll get a police artist." Dilbert and the police artist sit at a table. The artist sketches as Dilbert says, ". . . A big head, and kind of a frightened expression . . ." Dilbert looks at the drawing and says, "Perfect. Looks just like me. Now let's do the mugger. He was sort of off to the left here."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 22, 1989's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #door, #wrecking, #house, #johnsons, #leveled, #noise

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Dogbert and Dilbert sit at a table. The doorbell rings and Dilbert says, "Dogbert, see who's at the door." A man tells Dogbert, "Hi. I'm from the 'Big Ball Wrecking Company.' I have a work order to destroy this house." Dogbert reads the order and syas, "Looks like you have the wrong address. This is Walnut AVENUE. Walnut STREET is clear across town." The man says, "Oh phlegm! I don't have time to drive way over there." The man asks, "Would it be a bother if I just leveled this house instead?" Dogbert replies, "That would be a tad inconvenient. Try the Johnsons, next door." Dilbert asks, "What was that loud noise?" Dogbert replies, "Apparently the Johnsons aren't home."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 07, 1989's comic on:


Tags #Dogbert, #Dilbert, #nuclear, #power, #project, #inspection, #report

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Dilbert arrives home carrying a briefcase and says to Dogbert, "I got transferred to the Glickman Nuclear Power Project." Dogbert asks, "Aren't you worried about radiation?" Dilbert replies, "My boss says the last safety inspection was quite favorable." Dogbert asks, "What were his EXACT words?" Dilbert answers, ". . . The inspectors gave a glowing report." Dogbert says, "Maybe you'll mutate into something smarter."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 03, 1989's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #devil, #lettuce, #kitchen, #rationalization

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Dilbert stands in the kitchen looking at a grocery receipt and thinking, "Looks like they under-charged me twelve cents on the lettuce." Dilbert thinks, "I should go back and give them the twelve cents. But I'm sure they would tell me to keep it for being so honest." Phil, the Prince of Insufficient Light and the Ruler of Heck, shows up at the door and says to Dogbert, ". . . I have a report of a flimsy rationalization in progress." Dogbert says, "Try the kitchen."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 20, 1989's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #therapist, #looks, #moth, #mother, #disguise, #sweater, #ears

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Therapist: ...so it's clear that your fear of moths derives from you insecurity about your looks. Dilbert: Really? Therapist: I'm sure you're aware that those big floppy ears of yours make your head look like a winged insect in flight. Now, is it possible that your mother was a giant moth in disguise? Dilbert: Well, I lost a sweater once; maybe she ate it.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 02, 1989's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #pencil, #downward

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Dilbert holds up a chart and says to Dogbert, "On this graph, I have plotted the frequency of snide comments that you have made about me. I'm happy to report that the recent trend is downward." Dilbert asks, "See the big dip?" Dogbert says, "Get out your pencil . . ."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 15, 1989's comic on:


Tags #national news, #critics, #management, #megaslime corporation, #repitilian, #aliens

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Dilbert sits in his chair watching a television news report. The newscaster says, "And in national news . . ." The newscaster continues, "Critics today accused the management of Megaslime Corporation of being hideous reptilian aliens bent on enslaving the earth." The newscaster continues, "A spokesman for the company denied the charge." Dilbert says, "Whew!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 07, 1989's comic on:


Tags #Dogbert, #Dilbert, #shower, #egg, #lassie, #rin tin tin, #benji, #big, #furry

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Dogbert stands on a stool and looks in the bathroom mirror. He asks, "Do you think I look more like Rin Tin Tin or Lassie? Maybe Benji?" Dilbert stands in front of the shower with a towel around his waist. Dilbert replies, "I dunno . . . Maybe a big furry egg." Dogbert says, "With that little inspiration boost, I believe I am ready to attack the new day."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 11, 1989's comic on:


Tags #love, #poetry, #finish, #relationships

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Dilbert sits at his desk writing a poem. Dogbert approaches and asks, "How's that poem coming?" Dilbert says, "Pretty good, but I may have written myself into a corner." Dogbert says, "Let's hear." Dilbert says, "All I have so far is 'Her love was like a wave-division multiplexor.'" Dogbert says, "Maybe just go for the big finish."