Too Much Smut Comic Strips - Page 49

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502 Results for Too Much Smut

View 481 - 490 results for too much smut comic strips. Discover the best "Too Much Smut" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dogbert, #rex, #dinosaurs, #behavior, #congress, #laws, #president, #balance, #power

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Rex: Dogbert, what's the congress? Dogbert: They make laws, Rex. Rex: Then what does the president do? Dogbert: He vetoes the laws. It's called balance of power. Rex: I guess they don't get paid much for doing that. Dogbert: Here's the confusing part...

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #makeup, #invisible, #talking, #blind, #date

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Dogbert asks Dilbert, "How was your blind date?" Dilbert replies, "She wore too much makeup . . . And I had to do all the talking." Dogbert says, "Maybe she's a mime." Dilbert says, "That would explain her invisible dog."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #garbage man, #die, #cloning, #machine, #design, #math, #errors, #Dogbert, #Dilbert

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The garbage man asks Dogbert, "Not much garbage . . . Did somebody die?" Dogbert replies, "Dilbert went to the compost pile in the sky." The garbage man reads a piece of paper and says, "Bad timing . . . Judging from last week's garbage, he had almost finished his cloning machine design. I only notice a few linear math errors." The garbage man continues, "This design would just create a hologram and a bad chile con carne recipe." Dogbert says, "Man, you sure know your garbage!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #dinosaur, #massage, #masseur, #miracle, #spa, #angry, #bob, #Dogbert, #age, #client

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Dogbert says to Bob the Dinosaur, "Bob, I'd like you to be the masseur for my New Age Miracle Spa." Bob replies, "Dinosaurs don't know much about massage." Dogbert says, "That's okay. Just hurt the clients as much as possible." Bob asks, "Won't they get angry?" Dogbert replies, "Bob, Bob, Bob . . . You really aren't tuned to the New Age, are you?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #asteroid, #Dogbert, #death, #space, #evil, #golf ball, #dooms day

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Dilbert stands at a desk and Dogbert sits next to a telescope. Dilbert says, "According to my calculations, the asteroid 'Sagnorpt' will collide with earth in 2.3 minutes." Dogbert covers his eyes and screams, "We're all gonna die!" Dogbert hugs Dilbert's legs and shouts, "I'm sorry about all of those bad things I've done to you!" Dogbert cries, "I renounce my evil ways! I dedicate the remaining minute of my life to the poor!!" Dogbert says, "Waitta minute . . . Why aren't you groveling for salvation?" Dilbert replies, "The asteroid is only the size of a golf ball." There's a large crash. Dilbert lies on the floor after the asteroid hits him on the head. Dogbert says, "I probably shouldn't try to read too much into this."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dogbert, #rabert, #lab rats, #stupid, #professor, #heart, #laboratory, #escaping

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Rabert: Goodbye, Dogbert, I must return to the lab with the professor. Dogbert: That's stupid. Rabert: He says he loves me. That must be why he fed me so much. Dogbert: You're getting stupider. Rabert: I have to follow my heart. Dogbert: Mmm... Love causes stupidity in lab rats.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dogbert, #Dilbert, #rat, #plague-carrying, #vermin, #household, #personality, #television

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Dogbert says, "Dilbert, this is a rat. Rat, this is Dilbert." The rat says, "I've come to live here!" Dilbert says, "How lucky for us. We were just saying how much we needed a plague-carrying vermin to round out the household." The rat says to Dogbert, "He doesn't have much of a personality . . ." Dogbert replies, I usually drown him out with the television."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #pursued, #police, #fbi, #national guard, #obliterator

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Dilbert says to Dogbert, "Just great . . . You've destroyed half of the city with my 'Sonic Obliterator' invention . . ." Dilbert continues, "You're being pursued by the police, FBI and National Guard . . . I TRUSTED you. Is there anything you'd like to say to me?" Dogbert replies, "Oh, yeah, thank you very much for letting me borrow the Obliterator . . . It's been great . . . Can I use it again tomorrow?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #dog, #blowing, #sonic, #obliterator, #escape, #national, #guard, #pursuit, #post office

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Dilbert sits in his chair watching television. The newscaster says, "Our top story: a dog with glasses was seen blowing up empty mail trucks with some type of 'Sonic Obliterator.'" The reporter continues, "Much of the city is in ruins, as the dog blasted through building to escape police and National Guard pursuit." Dogbert says to Dilbert, "On the plus side, we have a much better shortcut to the post office."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #note, #Dilbert, #potato, #glasses, #eyes, #contact, #lenses, #reference, #Dogbert, #lady di, #witch, #witch's curse

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The panel says, "Note: Some new readers of this strip may be confused by the presence of a character who looks very much like a potato. The following comparison should clear things up:" A caption pointing to a drawing of Dilbert the Frog says, "Dilbert (turned into a frog and disguised as Prince Charles)." A caption points to a potato. The panel says, "A handy rule for telling which one is a potato is to look for the presence of glasses. Although potatoes do have eyes, they are know to be vain and generally prefer contact lenses. Keep this reference guide with you."