Their Own Jobs Comic Strips - Page 49

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487 Results for Their Own Jobs

View 481 - 487 results for their own jobs comic strips. Discover the best "Their Own Jobs" comics from Dilbert.com.

Pre Meeting

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Pre Meeting - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 30, 2019's comic on:


Tags #managers & supervisors, #meeting, #pre-meeting, #canceled, #sarcasm, #business, #reality

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boss: we canceled the meeting because we couldn't find a time for the pre-meeting to prepare for the meeting. dilbert: doesn't the pre-meeting need it's own pre-meeting? boss: good point. dilbert: sarcasm and reality have become one.

Hiring Morons

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Hiring Morons - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 17, 2020's comic on:


Tags #managers & supervisors, #technology, #business, #technical, #job, #market, #hire, #moron, #critical

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boss: the job market is so hot right now that we can only afford to hire morons. dilbert: how will we fill our critical technical jobs? boss: i just told you.

Ted Talks Creates A God

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Ted Talks Creates A God - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 28, 2020's comic on:


Tags #business, #technology, #mental, #midget, #ted talks, #binge-watching, #god, #dumb, #all knowing

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new hire: i must leave you mental midgets behind as i go start up my own company. i was once dumb like all of you. then i started binge-watching ted talks, and i evolved. dilbert: what are you now? new hire: some kind of god, i assume.

Stopping Theft Everywhere

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Stopping Theft Everywhere - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 24, 2020's comic on:


Tags #office workers, #business, #technology, #system, #reduce, #theft, #dumb, #product

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dilbert: and by using this system, we will drastically reduce theft. co-worker: that's the dumbest think i have ever heard. no one can stop theft everywhere in the world. dilbert: i said we would reduce it, not eliminate it. and only for our own products. co-worker: so, in other words, it won't work. dilbert: it works to reduce theft. co-worker: but you admit there will be theft. dilbert standing and yelling: what is wrong with you???? co-worker: hey, i'm not the one who is in favor of theft.

Boss Is In A High Risk Group

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Boss Is In A High Risk Group - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 27, 2020's comic on:


Tags #criticism, #health & safety, #office workers, #sarcasm, #virus, #pandemic, #risk

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Carol: Are you worried about coronavirus because you're in a high-risk group? Boss: Why would I be in a high-risk group? Carol: Do you own a full-length mirror? Boss: No. They make me look fat.

Scooch Over

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Scooch Over - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 10, 2020's comic on:


Tags #business, #business people, #destiny, #no, #people, #ruler, #sarcasm, #superpower

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dilbert talking to dogbert on couch dilbert: i've been saying "no" to people all week, and nothing bad happened to me. why did i never know about this superpower? now i am the ruler of my own destiny! scooch over. dogbert: no.

Artificial Dumbness

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 Artificial Dumbness  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 10, 2020's comic on:


Tags #business, #cell phone, #managers & supervisors, #technology, #software, #invention, #artificial, #dumb, #human, #face mask

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dilbert: my new software invention is called "artificial dumbness." it acts dumb so humans will think they are talking to one of their own. boss: that couldn't possibly work. dilbert's phone echos: that couldn't possibly work.