Alice Killed Boss Comic Strips - Page 5

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View 41 - 50 results for alice killed boss comic strips. Discover the best "Alice Killed Boss" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 29, 1991's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #pink, #slip, #color, #bad, #today, #rob

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Dilbert says to Dogbert, "My boss gave me the pink slip today." Dogbert says, "You must feel pretty bad." Dilbert walks away wearing a woman's slip. He says, "Yeah . . . Pink isn't my color."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 31, 1991's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #awkward, #parties, #d'oeuvres, #included, #working, #losers, #living, #idiot

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Dilbert stands by himself with a cocktail glass in his hand. He thinks, "I feel so awkward at these office parties . . ." Dilbert thinks, "I've already walked back and forth to the hors d'oeuvres six times." Dilbert thinks, "I'll stand close to these two and hope they include me." The man and woman turn their backs to Dilbert. He thinks, "It's not working." Dilbert thinks, "I'll have to find somebody who is alone." Dilbert thinks, "Hmm . . . All the people standing alone look like losers." Dilbert thinks, "I'll just say something . . . What have I got to lose?" He says to the Boss, "Hi." Dilbert says, "I'm Dilbert. Waht do you do for a living?" The Boss replies, "I'm your boss, idiot."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 29, 1991's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #the boss, #cerberus, #honor, #attention, #preppared, #challenge, #death, #monkeys, #winged

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The Boss says to Dilbert, "Ask my secretary to schedule a meeting." Dilbert thinks, "Groan." Dilbert kneels in front of the secretary's desk and says, "Uh . . . Excuse me . . . Excuse me . . . Miss Cerberus, could a humble employee have the honor of your attention?" The secretary yells, "Are you prepared to take the challenge of death?!!" Dilbert asks, "Does this involve any winged monkeys?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 30, 1991's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #the boss, #mail boy, #willy, #trick, #challenge, #death

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The Boss's Secretary Carol: You must pass the challenge of death before I put you on the boss's calendar. Bring me the head of Willy the mail boy!!! Dilbert: Hey, Willy, would you like to see a trick?

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 01, 1991's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #boss, #secretary, #cerberus, #calendar, #head, #willy, #mail, #boy, #choice, #bowling

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Dilbert says to Dogbert, ". . . So, then my boss's secretary, Miss Cerberus, says she won't put me on the calendar unless I bring her the HEAD of Willy the Mail Boy." Dilbert holds out a bag with something round in it and says, "What choice did I have?" Dogbert's ears fly up in shock. Dilbert says, "I went bowling." Dogbert looks angry.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 03, 1991's comic on:


Tags #the boss, #Dilbert, #department, #machines, #filled, #bird, #bobs, #head, #three, #birds, #job

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Dilbert sits across from the Boss's desk. The Boss says, "I've decided to replace your department with machines." The Boss points to a toy on the desk and says, "Your job will be filled by this little bird that bobs his head up and down." Back at home, Dilbert tells Dogbert, ". . . Then I said 'Ha! It would take at least THREE of those birds to do MY job!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 19, 1991's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #the boss, #introduce, #new employee, #odyssey, #bud, #vice-versa, #week

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The Boss says, "Dilbert, I'd like you to introduce the new guy to everybody." Dilbert thinks, "Groan." The Boss walks away thinking, "This way I never have to learn their names." Dilbert tells the new guy, "The first stop on our odyssey is Bud." Dilbert says, "Uh . . . Bud, this is the new guy, and vice versa." The new guy smiles. Bud looks up from the newspaper and says, "What's this?! Another pink-bottomed, Ivy League, management 'trainee'?!" Bud shouts, "In MY day, you had to start at the bottom . . . And by golly, you STAYED there!!" The new guy asks, "How long have you worked here?" Bud replies, "A week . . . This happens pretty quickly."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 03, 1991's comic on:


Tags #Dogbert, #the boss, #business, #consultant, #credibility, #person, #speak, #slower

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Dogbert sits across from the Boss's desk. The Boss says, "Why should I hire you as my business consultant?" Dogbert replies, "I have credibility because I don't work for your company. No smart person would work here full-time." The Boss says, "I work here full-time." Dogbert says, "Sorry. I'll try to speak slower."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 04, 1991's comic on:


Tags #Dogbert, #the boss, #consulting, #job, #questioning, #employees, #underpaid, #problems, #fault, #lard, #head

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Dogbert and the Boss walk out of the Boss's office. Dogbert says, "My fee for business consulting is $200 an hour." The Boss says, "Fair enough." Dogbert says, "I'll spend the day questioning your employees to identify problem areas." Later that day, Dogbert sits across from the Boss's desk. Dogbert reads a document and says, "It's unanimous. They're underpaid and all the problems are your fault, 'Lard Head.'"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 05, 1991's comic on:


Tags #Dogbert, #consultant, #plunging, #problem, #easy, #solve, #training, #budget, #brains

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Dogbert stands in front of an easel and points to a diagram. The Boss and a woman sit at a conference table. Dogbert says, "Your profits are plunging." Dogbert continues, "The problem will not be easy to solve." The diagram shows a large brain labeled "competitors," a smaller brain labeled "beavers," and a tiny brain labeled "you." The Boss asks, "So, what should we do? Cut the training budget again?"