Clean Mold Comic Strips - Page 5

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View 41 - 50 results for clean mold comic strips. Discover the best "Clean Mold" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #statue of liberty, #destroy, #pr, #responsibility, #clean up, #new york harbor, #light show, #weapon demo, #podium, #speech, #fish food

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CEO says, "The media is on our back because we accidentally destroyed the Statue of Liberty. We need your P.R. advice." Dogbert says, "Did you take full responsibility and promise to clean up the harbor?" CEO says, "Ooh." Earlier that day CEO says, "Many of you don't know that the Statue of Liberty was very old... and made entirely of fish food."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #statue of liberty, #destroy, #pr, #responsibility, #clean up, #new york harbor, #light show, #weapon demo, #consultant, #cuba, #air force, #sink, #yell, #angry, #private jet, #head, #business

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Dogbert the public relations consultant Dogbert says, "So you accidentally destroyed the Statue of Liberty?" Dogbert says, "Her head is floating toward Cuba, and the president will probably order the air force to sink it." CEO says, "I should watch that from my private jet." Dogbert says, "FOCUS!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #clean up, #janitor, #crime scene, #push broom, #deadly computer explosions

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Dilbert says, "I got transferred to our crime scene cleanup subsidiary." Dilbert says, "I have a competitive advantage because I have the customer lists from our other subsidiaries." Man says, "No, we haven't had any deadly computer explosions here." Dilbert says, "I'll check back in an hour."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #cleaning, #janitor, #crime scene, #overalls, #assistant, #excited, #squeegee, #brains

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Dilbert says, "Ratbert, would you like to be my assistant in the crime scene cleaning profession?" Ratbert says, "Me?!" Ratbert says, "You had me at 'brains and squeegees.'" Dilbert says, "I didn't say any of those words." Ratbert says, "Would it kill you to say them now?" Dilbert says, "If it does, you can clean me up."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #human resources, #complaint, #cat, #lunch, #clean room, #loofah, #french bread, #itch back, #animals, #business

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Catbert says, "I'm getting a lot of complaints about you eating your lunch in the clean room." Catbert says, "And people don't like it when you use a loofah in there." The Boss says, "That's my french bread. And I can't help it if my back itches."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #train mailroom guy, #worthjless, #unimportant, #email, #shovel emails, #recycling bins, #clean desk

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The Boss says, "Wally, I need you to train the new mailroom guy." Wally says, "Why me?" The Boss says, "Because he's unimportant and you're worthless." Wally says, "Okay, I was worried that it was the other way around." Wally says, "All important messages are sent by e-mail." Wally says, "So your job is to shovel all of the regular mail into recycling bins." Wally says, "We won't be paying you, but you can use packages and tape to build your own igloo." Two weeks later The Boss says, "Why is my desk so clean?" Wally says, "You're welcome."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #same facial hair, #weird haitdo, #unique, #need to be original

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Coworker says, "Gaaa!!! The second-uncoolest person in the world has my same facial hair!" Coworker says, "And the uncoolest person in the world is clean-shaven. You're leaving me no place to go!" Later that month Alice says, "I don't see it catching on." Coworker says, "Give it time."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #obliviousness, #obstinacy, #office workers, #whiteboard, #conference room, #prohject timeline, #zombie reflex mode

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Dilbert: Don't clean the whiteboard in the conference room. It has my project timeline. Janitor: I can't promise that. I slip into a sort of zombie reflex mode when I do this job. Dilbert: I envy you. Janitor: Would you like a few minutes to say goodbye to your timeline?

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #flip house, #foreclosed, #mold, #red flags, #residential buildings, #squatters, #urine

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Boss: I bought a foreclosed house for $500. I plan to flip it for profit. Dilbert: Did the disclosures have any red flags? Boss: They claim there's a lot of mold and enexploded ordnance. But I don't see how either of those things could have survived the urine from the crack squatters.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #inventions, #waterworks, #invented filter, #raw sewage, #pure drinking water, #clean water, #upper container, #drank contaminated water

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Dilbert: I invented a filter that can turn raw sewage into pure drinking water in seconds. CEO: Glug glug glug. Dilbert: The clean water ends up here in the upper container.