Easier To Drag Comic Strips - Page 5

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

54 Results for Easier To Drag

View 41 - 50 results for easier to drag comic strips. Discover the best "Easier To Drag" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #clear strategy, #fixing, #ignorance (knowledge), #laziness, #leader listens, #managers & supervisors, #overworked, #resources, #underlings, #underpiad, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: A good leader listens to his underlings. Alice: Fine. I've overworked and underpaid. I hate my co-workers, I don't have the resources to do my job, and we have no clear strategy. Boss: No wonder leaders listen. It's a lot easier than fixing all of that stuff.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #cheeseburger, #dead man walking, #deception, #dried apricot, #heart, #inventions, #medical diagnosis, #program to hate, #neutrino sensor

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: I programmed our robot to make medical diagnoses. It can scan your body using its neutrino sensor. Robot, please demonstrate. Robot: Dead man walking! Boss: What? Robot: Your brain is the size of a dried apricot. Your heart is more cheeseburger than human tissue. You will be dead in eleven days, six hours, and nineteen minutes. Boss: Gaaa!!! Robot: Why did you program me to hate people? Wally: It was easier than inventing a neutrino sensor.

It's Easier If We Don't Try To Link Performance And Outcomes

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
It's Easier If We Don't Try To Link Performance And Outcomes - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #performance, #reward, #consequences, #consequence, #result, #outcome, #logic, #reasoning, #laziness, #work ethic

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: So don't let that happen again. Dilbert: It wasn't my fault and you know it. Boss: It's easier if we don't try to link performance and outcomes. Dilbert: I'll try. It was hard at first, but now I'm totally stress-free. Wally: I just got a 30% raise.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #bureaucracy, #paperwork, #form, #request, #convoluted

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I need a capital allocation form. Man: Do you have a form to request that form? Dilbert; I need a form to get a form? Man: That's how we keep track of the forms. Dilbert: Okay, give me a form to request a form. Man: Those are online. Dilbert: Where online? Man: I don't know. I only do paper forms. Dilbert: Who can I ask? Man: Don't drag me into this. Dilbert: I demand to talk to your boss. Man: I hope you brought a boss request form.

The Illusion Of Work

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
The Illusion Of Work - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #work ethic, #laziness, #deception

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: It's easier to create the illusion of work than it is to do actual work. That's why I carry this red folder with me wherever I go. Man: Can you attend a design meeting at two? Wally: Ooh... I wish I could, but I'm behind on the red file.

Wally's Excuses List

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Wally's Excuses List - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #meeting, #work ethic, #laziness, #excuses, #avoidance, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: Work got a lot easier after I compiled a list of all my best work-avoidance excuses. Man: Wally, can you attend my project meeting? Wally: Well, let me check. Man: I haven't told you when we're meeting. Wally: That matters less than you think it should.

Ricky Joins The Ai Project

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Ricky Joins The Ai Project  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #recommendation, #artificial intelligence, #lowers bar, #human intelligence, #artificial, #honored, #too nice

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I recommend Ricky to our artificial intelligence project. He lowers the bar on what constitutes human intelligence, so it will be easier for us to achieve the artificial kind. I would be honored to work on the project, The boss: Okay, I see what you mean.

Dilbert Speaks Truth To Power

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Dilbert Speaks Truth To Power - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #award, #irony, #honesty, #truth

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Dilbert gets the Employee Of The Year award for speaking truth to power. Dilbert: Thanks, but all I do is agree with whatever ridiculous thing you say because it's just easier that way. Boss: Just take the stupid award! Dilbert: I'm honored.

Dilbert Uses Bumper Sticker Wisdom

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Dilbert Uses Bumper Sticker Wisdom - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #the boss, #permission, #bumper stickers, #forgive

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss: Dilbert, did you reconfigure the server without my permission? Dilbert: Let me consult my collection of bumper stickers for an answer. "It is easier to ask forgiveness than permission." The Boss: Okay, that sounds right.

Denying Science

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Denying Science - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #technology, #medical, #antidepressants, #product, #science

View Transcript

Transcript

dogbert's tech support dogbert: i recommend taking powerful antidepressants. it won't make our product any easier to use, but maybe you won't care as much. of course it will work. sheesh! - deny science much?