Eat A Bug Comic Strips - Page 5
238 Results for Eat A Bug
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Share January 05, 1992's comic on:
Tags #Dogbert, #Entertainment, #thanks, #babysit, #doggie bert, #bret, #impressionable, #years, #innocent, #adult, #nonsense, #parents, #space, #aliens, #eat, #slaughter, #house, #kindergarten, #change, #probably
A man and woman say to Dogbert, "Thanks for agreeing to baby-sit, Dogbert." Dogbert says, "No sweat." A baby says, "Doggie-Bert!" Dogbert says, "Sit down, Bret." Dogbert and the infant sit on the floor. Dogbert says, "You're in your most innocent and impressionable years." Dogbert continues, "As an adult, it is my duty to fill your sponge-like brain with incredible nonsense for my own entertainment." Dogbert continues, "Your parents are really space aliens." The baby looks frightened. Dogbert continues, "They're just fattening you up so they can eat you!" Dogbert continues, "The slaughterhouse is a place they call kindergarten!!" The father hands Dogbert his money and says, "Thanks, Dogbert. Did you change him?" Dogbert replies, "Probably."
Share January 09, 1992's comic on:
Dilbert sits at his desk. Ratbert enters carrying an apple and says, "Snack time, Dilbert! I brought you an apple so you will like me!" Dilbert says, "Nice try, Ratbert, but I don't want to eat something that was touched by a rat." Ratbert says sadly, "The worst part is that's why I didn't eat it myself."
Share January 19, 1992's comic on:
Dilbert and his uncle sit at a table eating dinner. Dilbert says, "Uncle Ned, can we see your hunting trophies after dinner?" Dilbert looks at a mounted bear head and says, "Oooh . . ." Ned says, "I bagged this one at the zoo." Dilbert says, "The zoo? That's illegal." Ned replies, "No wonder everybody got so excited." Ned shows Dilbert some other plaques and says, "These are some doves I killed with the help of my loyal dog, Rusty." They walk past a mounted dog and Ned says, "That's Rusty. We ran out of doves . . ." They look at the heads of a man, woman and cat. Ned says, "These were my neighbors - Florence, Dave and Muffin." Dilbert carries Dogbert under his arm and says, "Hey, look at the time! Got to run!" Ned asks, "Don't you want to see my 'Hall-O'-Postal Employees'?" Dilbert and Dogbert leave the house. Dilbert says, "New rule: Find out their hobbies before you eat their pot roast." Dogbert says, "We should have stayed for the 'Hall-O'-Postal Employees.'"
Share April 03, 1992's comic on:
Dilbert and a woman sit at a table in a restaurant. Dilbert says, ". . . So, then I thought, ha! Maybe there's a bug in the computer program itself!" The woman reaches into her purse. The woman sprays Dilbert with a can of mace and he screams. Dilbert says, "Maybe that story went on a little long . . ." The woman asks, "What gave it away?"
Share April 18, 1992's comic on:
Ratbert and Dogbert stand on the sidewalk. Ratbert stomps on a bug and says, "The mighty hunter strikes his wily prey!" Ratbert continues, "The hunter is awash in manly hormones. He has mastered his sport and conquered one of nature's best." Ratbert says to Dogbert, "I used to feel guilty about this until I realized it's a sport."
Share May 03, 1992's comic on:
Dilbert and Dogbert walk out of a restaurant. The sign in the window says, "All you can eat $7.00." A man yells, "Hey! Stop!" The waiter says, "You owe us another $14." The waiter continues, "You deliberately put more than you could eat on your plates." The man continues, "Technically, our agreement is 'all you can eat,' not 'all you can waste.'" The man thinks, "Mom wanted me to be a lawyer, but I said, 'No, food services is where I'm needed.'" Dilbert says, "I believe this is your department, Dogbert." Dogbert says, "Technically, it's all you CAN eat, not all you DO eat." The man thinks, "Ooh . . . He's good."
Share May 31, 1992's comic on:
Dilbert sits across from a man's desk. The man says, "Thanks for your time, Dilbert. It's always good to get the technical perspective." Dilbert says, "Hey, it's lunchtime. Would you like to join me in the cafeteria?" The man replies, "Ooh . . . No, I couldn't do that." The man explains, "I'm on the management track, so I can't be seen eating lunch with you." The man continues, "If I'm seen with an ordinary employee then people will think I'm ordinary." The man continues, "I'd like to eat with the senior executives, but of course they don't want to be seen with me." The man slides under his desk and says, "So I've perfected a method of slipping quietly away at lunch time." Dilbert turns to the reader and says, "The scary part is that someday that man will be my boss."
Share June 30, 1992's comic on:
Dilbert, Dogbert and several other passengers stand in waist-deep snow. Dilbert says, "We're alive . . . We must have been thrown clear when the jet hit the mountain." The airplane captain says to Dilbert, "I'm Captain Bob. Sorry about the crash. What are the odds I'd hit this same mountain on every flight?" As Bob walks away Dilbert says, "We're in luck. Captain Bob knows how to survive these situations." Bob thinks, "Nice folks. I'll eat them last."
Share July 02, 1992's comic on:
Dogbert, Dilbert, a man in a pilot's uniform and another man stand on a snow-covered mountain where their airplane crashed. Dogbert says, "Captain Bob, I think you're planning to eat the other survivors." Captain Bob replies, "Ha ha! Too bad your only hope is to send a message to the village at the base of this mountain." Dogbert throws a snowball at the captain, knocking him off his feet. Dogbert says, "When you roll into town, tell them Dogbert sent you."
Share July 03, 1992's comic on:
Dilbert stands in his house talking on the telephone. His clothes are disheveled. Dilbert says into the phone, "Lucky Airlines? I demand payment for the luggage I lost when we crashed into the mountain." Dilbert says, "No, technically it's not 'lost.' . . . Well, yes, I did eat your complimentary peanuts . . ." Dilbert hands the phone to Dogbert and says, "Help me out here . . . So far, I've agreed to hot-wax their tarmac."