Idiot Comic Strips - Page 5
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Character
136 Results for Idiot
View 41 - 50 results for idiot comic strips. Discover the best "Idiot" comics from Dilbert.com.
Saturday October 15,
2005
Tags return frisbee, doesn't fly, software cd, total idiot, users manual, poorly written
Transcript
"I'd like to return this Frisbee (TM). It doesn't fly right." "This is a software CD. Only a total idiot would think it was a Frisbee (TM)." "In my defense, the user's manual was poorly written." "Plus you're a total idiot."
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marketing, project, cloud, catbert, leadership, budget, birthday, engineer, time sheet, sales, wally, strategy, dogbert, powerpoint, project management, topper, leader, boss, change, meeting, data, management, mordac
Sunday March 26,
2006
Tags children, costume, embarrassment, parents, respect, work, tattoo, daught traylor, corporate environment, Family
Transcript
"What's that thing doing here?" "This is my daughter, Traylor." "I brought her to the office so she can learn about working in a corporate environment." "Okay, whatever. I have a new project for you." "Some idiot cut his finger. Now we have to do a safety awareness campaign." "Put on this dog costume. You're the mascot for our 'Spot' the safety hazard campaign." "Whenever anyone walks by, you say, 'Woof woof, don't use scissors.'" "Can I get a tattoo?" "Sure."
Monday April 10,
2006
Tags less prodcutive, automatic promotion, hiring, work like idiot, look like idiot, pointy haired alice
Transcript
"Alice, I need you to be less productive." "I'll get an automatic promotion if I can justify hiring one more direct report." "If I'm going to work like an idiot, I might as well look like one."
Monday June 05,
2006
Friday June 09,
2006
Friday October 06,
2006
Sunday March 25,
2007
Transcript
And now for another round of e-mail judo. "Let's see...This guy wants me to attend a meeting." "Eee-yah! I'll tell him I'm booked." "This guy wants some information." "Eee-yah! I'll tell him my hard drive crashed." "This idiot wants my input on his document." "Eee-yah! I'll tell him the attachment won't open." "Who's winning today?" "Not the people who sent me e-mail. Eee-yah!"
Sunday June 17,
2007
Tags office noise, whistling, comnfrontation, whiney appearence, cubicle, freakin moron, work-around situation
Transcript
Dilbert: "Gaaa! That idiot is whistling in his cube again!!!" "I would complain but I don't like confrontation." "I can't talk to his boss because I would appear whiney." "There's only one solution." "Alice, please stop by my cubicle when you get a second." Alice: "What's up? Wait. I'll be right back." "STOP WHISTLING, YOU FREAKIN' MORON!!!" "What's up?" Dilbert: "Never mind. I found a work-around."
Monday June 18,
2007
Tags save planet, bad career advice, fired, no longer communtes, licencse, sell realestate
Transcript
Dilbert: One way to save the planet is to drive a fuel-efficient car. "Another way is to give bad advice to some idiot so he gets fired and no longer commutes." Dogbert: "You should get a license to sell real estate." "Really?"
Saturday October 27,
2007
Tags Advice, roll my eyes, sigh deeply, dismiss, village idiot
Transcript
"Do you mind if I give you some advice?" Dilbert: "Not at all." "Do you mind if I roll my eyes, sigh deeply, and dismiss your advice as if it came from the village idiot?" "I might mind." Dilbert: "Well then, let me give you some advice..."

