Individual Cubicles Comic Strips - Page 5

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101 Results for Individual Cubicles

View 41 - 50 results for individual cubicles comic strips. Discover the best "Individual Cubicles" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 01, 1999's comic on:


Tags #hidden camera, #capture theief, #raining cubicles, #human form, #grainy picture

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Dilbert slips a tape into a VCR as the boss watches. Dilbert says, "I used a hidden camera to capture the thief who's been raiding our cubicles." The picture on the TV screen is the boss. The boss says, "The picture is grainy but I can almost make out a human form... or maybe a cat."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 01, 1999's comic on:


Tags #bans cofee, #cubicles, #distarction, #mess up desks, #alice, #too tsupid, #drink coffee and work, #same time, #ceo, #expenses

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The boss reads from a piece of paper in a meeting. The boss says, "The new policy from our CEO bans coffee from cubicles." The boss says, "Because he says, "It causes a distraction" and can "mess up desks." Dilbert says, "How did..." Alice says, "Hold it Dilbert." Wally says, "It's Alice's turn." Alice says, "You get the next easy one." Wally says, "Make us proud." Alice says, "Ahem, ahem" Alice says, "How did he become ceo..." Alice stands and says, "...if he's too stupid to drink coffee and work at the same time?" The boss says, "Our CEO also discussed unnecessary expenses." Wally says, to Dilbert, "Lucky!" Dilbert says, "Ahem."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 03, 1999's comic on:


Tags #designing call center, #eployees, #bathroom breaks, #tiny cubicles, #monitor calls, #speed, #customer service

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Designing a Call Center Catbert: Give the employees six minutes of bathroom breaks per shift. The Boss: Tiny cubicles and we'll monitor calls and have incompatible objectives such as speed and customer service. = Wally: Hows the project going? Dilbert: Im still collecting the abuser requirements.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 10, 2000's comic on:


Tags #mapped genome, #hr dept, #had resources, #pencil, #technology, #predictions from genes, #genome, #dna, #work perfromance, #traits, #violation of rights

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Catbert approaches Wally and says, "I mapped your genome Wally." Wally replies, "I didn't know the human resources department had that technology." Catbert responds, "I used a pencil." Wally says to Catbert, "Your genes predict that you will be a bitter, lazy, caucasian guy with six hairs and poor vision." Catbert answers, "You'll hate cubicles, measurable objectives, and cats who map your genome." Wally says to Catbert, "This is a violation of my right to privacy! I'll fight it all the way to the Supreme Court." Catbert responds, "No, according to my map, you'll lose interest and fall asleep." Catbert says to Wally as he sleeps, "I wonder if this technology will ever fall into the wrong hands."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 01, 2001's comic on:


Tags #approval, #computer purchse, #capital budget, #ceo, #apparoval, #asks for things, #assemble computer, #cubicles, #cheap boss, #need approval

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Dilbert approaches the Boss' desk with a piece of paper. Dilbert says, "I need your approval for to buy a new computer." The Boss says, "Eh! Eh!" as Dilbert speaks. The Boss replies, "There's a freeze on the capital budget. Only our CEO can approve it." Dilbert holds out the slip of paper again and says, "Could you ask him to..." as The Boss says, "Eh! Eh!" The Boss replies, "I don't want to be the guy who always asks for things." The Boss continues, "Maybe you could assemble a computer from components that are each within my approval limit?" Dilbert asks, "What's your approval limit?" The Boss replies, "Ten dollars." Dilbert says, "If you need me, I'll be in my cubicle banging my head against the wall." The Boss stands overlooking the cubicles from his office door as sounds of "Thud! Thud! Thud! come from a cubicle. The Boss thinks to himself, "This is why I keep them in soft-walled containers."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 18, 2001's comic on:


Tags #brain washed, #hypnosis, #inspire, #lowers of communication, #must work harder, #no good reason, #powers of communication, #better employees

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The Boss is sitting at his computer. He thinks to himself, "My powers of communication will inspire them to be better employees." Dilbert points at his computer screen and exclaims, "Gaaa!! He's using his powers of communication against us!" Wally looks on with a panicked expression. Asok walks past Dilbert and Wally's cubicles like a zombie. His arms are out- stretched and his body is stiff. He says, "Must work harder for no good reason." Dilbert and Wally poke their heads from behind their cubicle walls. Dilbert says, "We're too late!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 20, 2001's comic on:


Tags #music in offcie, #can't concentrate, #turn it down, #drive you nuts, #complain, #cubicles, #separation, #desks

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Dilbert leans over the cubicle wall and says, "Could you turn off the music? I can't concentrate" to the coworker next to him. The coworker replies, "How about if I turn it down to a level where it still drives you nuts but you're too shy to complain a second time?" Dilbert says, "Thank you." The coworker says, "It might creep up over time."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 18, 2001's comic on:


Tags #binge eating, #both mandatory and prohibited, #budget freeze, #corporate communications, #cubicle, #danville font, #danville font software, #department, #negativity, #next evaluation, #non stop sobbing, #approved corporate font, #no eating, #cubicles

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The Boss says to Tina, "Tina, you didn't use the approved corporate font." The Boss continues, "Our corporate communications department days we have to use the danville font." Tina replies, "No problem. I'll buy the danville font software today." The Boss says, "There's a budget freeze on software purchases." Tina asks, "So.. the danville font is both mandatory and prohibited?" The Boss says, "Remind me to ding you for negativity on your next evaluation." Tina responds, "I think I'll do some binge eating and non-stop sobbing at my cubicle now." Tina continues, "Unless that's prohibited too." The Boss replies, "No eating in cubicles."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 13, 2002's comic on:


Tags #manager, #individual contributor, #job description, #wear huge glasses

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Dilbert is talking to a woman. She asks, "Are you a manager?" Dilbert responds, "No, I'm an individual contributor." The woman says, "So, basically, you have the same job description as an ant?" Dilbert responds, "I'd like to see an ant try to wear huge glasses like these!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 16, 2002's comic on:


Tags #ceo visit, #tour of cubicles, #bunch of boxes, #pretend to work

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Headline: The CEO Visit. The Boss says to the CEO, "Would you like a tour of our cubicles?" The CEO responds, "Why would I want to see a bunch of boxes filled with people pretending to work?" The CEO continues, "Unless that's the only thing you planned for the first thirty minutes of my visit."