Laziness Comic Strips - Page 5

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182 Results for Laziness

View 41 - 50 results for laziness comic strips. Discover the best "Laziness" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags incompetetnt, laziness, passive agressive, threatened me more, work ethic, realtionships, defensive, admits to incompetetnt

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Coworker: I can't tell if you're passive-aggressive or just incompetent. Wally: Which one sends a message that I could do good work if you threatened me more? Coworker: Passive-aggressive. Wally: Okay. I'm the other one.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags laziness, work ethic, slacker, entire career, listen to podcasts, drink coffe, surf internet, multi slacking

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Wally: I've been a slacker my entire career, but now I want more out of life. My plan is to listen to podcasts while I drink coffee and search the Internet for fun. Dilbert: Multi-slacking? Wally: Wish me luck.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags laziness, money, billion dollars, stop working, self defeating

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Dilbert: If you made a billion dollars, would you stop working? Wally: How would I make a billion dollars? Dilbert: You would have to start working. Wally: It seems sort of self-defeating.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags deception, laziness, successful people, start early, really working, boss, first four hours

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Wally: Studies show that successful people can start early. Can I start work at 4AM and quit at noon? Boss: How would I know you were really working the first four hours? Wally: Same way you know now. Boss: I don't know now. Wally: It's like that but with less attendance.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags laziness, stress

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Asok: I am always tense and I don't know why. Wally: It's the tyranny of expectations, Asok. People still expect you to add value. Competence is a vicious cycle. Asok: Can you teach me to be useless like you? Wally: It's better if I don't so you can learn by example.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags laziness, not caring what others think, total uslessness, key to success, discussion, employees, hoping it goes, business

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Wally: Asok, the key to success is not caring what others think of you. Coincidentally, that is also the key to being totally useless. The important thing is that other people can't tell which way you're hoping it goes.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags deception, laziness, productivity, work ethic, sensors detect, cubicle, engineering, problem, five years, robot, boss, temporary boss

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Temporary Robot Boss. Robot: My sensors detect no work coming from this cubicle. Wally: That's because I have been working on an engineering problem in my head for five years. Robot: Are you almost done? Wally: I was, but you just made me forget all of it.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags bad karma, cereal, demon, devil, fear, insufficient light, laziness, leftover cereal, managing vibe, menace, spoon

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Phil: I am Phil, The Prince of Insufficient Light. I got a report that you wished bad karma upon your co-workers. Dilbert: You would put off a more menacing vibe if you didn't have leftover cereal in your pitchspoon. Phil: I was really hungry and I didn't feel like emptying the dishwasher. Dilbert: We've all been there.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags deception, holidays, laziness, trust, work ethic, telecommute, bring kid to work, work from home, distrust, corrodes motivation, toxic environment, ruin naps

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Wally: Is it okay if I telecommute on "Bring Your Kid To Work" Day? I'll show my kid how I work from home. Boss: How would I know you were working? Wally: What??!! That is exactly the sort of distrust that corrodes the motivation of employees! How can I feel good about my job in this toxic atmosphere? Boss: Okay, okay. You can work from home on "Bring Your Kid To Work" Day. Dilbert: You don't have a kid. Wally: I hear they ruin your naps.

Wally's Document Doesn't Open

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Wally's Document Doesn't Open - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags jargon, laziness, technology, document, project update, hard disk, erase, reinstall, operating system, work

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Boss: I couldn't open the document you sent with your project update. Wally: Try erasing your hard disk and reinstalling the operating system. Boss: I guess I don't need it that badly. Wally: After all the work I put into making that document?