Likes Wood Comic Strips - Page 5

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72 Results for Likes Wood

View 41 - 50 results for likes wood comic strips. Discover the best "Likes Wood" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 24, 2007's comic on:


Tags #wally refuses, #stop eating, #noisy snacks, #likes salt, #more ethan you, #kelp, #oatmeal

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Tina: I asked Wally to stop eating noisy snacks in his cubicle but he refuses. Catbert: "That's because he likes salt more than he likes you. We all feel the same way." Tina: "What?" CAtbert: "You're somewhere between oatmeal and kelp."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 30, 2008's comic on:


Tags #elf, #feel special, #likes pets, #random stack, #birthday, #birthday cards

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Alice says, "Today is Shelly's birthday. We should make her feel special." Alice says, "Do you still have that random stack of birthday cards you got on sale last year?" Dilbert says, "I'm all over it." Alice says, "She likes pets. The closest thing you have is an elf." Dilbert says, "Draw whiskers on it."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 29, 2009's comic on:


Tags #orders, #demands, #work, #ridiculous, #confused

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The Boss says, "Asok, rummage through the piles on my desk and find yourself something to do." The boss says, "Afterward, chastise yourself for not doing it the way I would have." Asok says, "Even if you would have done it wrong?" The boss, "Especially then. No one likes a show-off."

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Share December 21, 2009's comic on:


Tags #artist, #struggling, #bills, #art, #abstract

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Man says, "I work here to pay the bills but I'm actually an artist." Dilbert says, "Wow. You must be a terrible artist if you have to work here just to eat." Man says, "My work isn't commercial." Wally says, "It's not really art if no one likes it."

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Share March 09, 2010's comic on:


Tags #scope, #calibrated, #budget, #save money, #friend, #elrod, #shady, #tinker, #bad idea, #car, #bathrub, #drink, #relationships

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Dilbert says, "Our scope needs to be calibrated. Do we have a budget for that?" The Boss says, "We can save a few bucks by sending it to my friend, Elrod. He likes to tinker." Dilbert says, "Everything about that idea is bad." The Boss says, "You should see the car he made from a bathtub."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 08, 2010's comic on:


Tags #birthday cake, #coworker, #Scott, #spit, #candle, #sarcastic, #queen of england, #fancy

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Carol says, "We're having a birthday cake for Scott in the break room." Dilbert says, "No thanks. I prefer cake that isn't frosted with the spit of recent candle-blowing." Carol says, "Oooh, look at the Queen of England who likes her cake without spit. What's it like to be fancy?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 12, 2010's comic on:


Tags #job interview, #sales, #travel, #business, #idiot, #angry

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The Boss says, "The opening is in sales. Do you like to travel." Man says, "Yes. It's my favorite thing." The Boss says, "No one likes business travel. You're either an idiot or you've never done business travel." Man says, "How dare you accuse me of not traveling."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 21, 2010's comic on:


Tags #new product, #front, #meeting, #block of wood, #cell phone, #network, #cool, #business, #technology

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Dogbert says, "Our new product is a useless block of wood." Dogbert says, "When customers complain that it won't make phone calls, we'll blame the network." The Boss says, "Who would want? whoa, this is cool." Dogbert says, "You'd be lucky to have one."

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Share September 22, 2010's comic on:


Tags #new product, #block of wood, #ceo, #salesman, #high forehead, #inneundo, #leader

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Dogbert says, "Your product is nothing but a piece of wood. You need a charismatic pitchman to make gullible consumers buy it." Dogbert says, "Normally that would be your job as CEO. Unfortunately, you remind people of a giant?" CEO says, "Leader?" Dogbert says, "Exactly."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 23, 2010's comic on:


Tags #pitchman, #new product, #salesman, #block of wood, #machine, #rays, #reality distortion, #stand on stool, #consumers

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Dogbert the Pitchman Dogbert says, "Fire up the reality distortion field as soon as I'm introduced." Dogbert says, "Our product is nothing but a block of wood, and yet you need three of them." Man says, "I am a creative individual who does as he is told." Man 2 says, "I can't feel my arm!"