String Theory Comic Strips - Page 5

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

82 Results for String Theory

View 41 - 50 results for string theory comic strips. Discover the best "String Theory" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #come back, #manager, #moron, #promotions, #raises, #leaving company

View Transcript

Transcript

Asok and Alice sit at a table eating lunch. Alice says, "When I was your age, we had things called 'promotions' and 'raises.'" Alice continues, "These days you can only get ahead by leaving the company for a year then coming back as a high-level manager." Asok says, "So the theory must be that anyone who would return to this company is . . ." Alice answers, "A moron. Correct."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #recyclable, #trash container, #two containers

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert says to the janitor, "I notice you have only one trash container with you..." Dilbert holds up two trash cans. He says, "Whereas I have two containers - one for trash and one for recyclable materials." Dilbert says, "One theory is that you make two trips to each cubicle..." THe janitor says, "Could you turn around for a second?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #cubicle police, #living organisms, #stack of paper

View Transcript

Transcript

A policeman with a watchdog says to Wally, "I'm with the cubicle police. This is a safety violation. He points to a huge stack of papers. Wally says, "It's perfectly safe unless you tap it with a flashlight or a dog jumps on it." The stack of paper collapses on the cop and his little dog, too. Dilbert says, "This plays right into my theory that cubicles are living organisms."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #nobel prize committee, #theory, #pig layin, #nobel prize commitee, #otonphay, #ratbert

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert is sitting on the couch. Ratbert says, "I submitted our garbage man's theory to the Nobel prize committee." Ratbert says, "I hope I wrote the theory right. I don't know shorthand so I used pig latin to save time." Nobel Prize Committee: Three guys with hair like Albert Einstein sit looking at papers. One says, "What's an "oton-phay"? A second guy says, "I love what you're doing with your hair."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #clothes defective, #going to kitchen, #maintain discipline, #telecommute, #throry, #wearing work clothes, #clothes

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert is sitting at his computer and says, "I'm wearing work clothes while I telecomute, to maintain discipline." Dobgert stands behind him and says, "Is it working?" Dilbert gets up and walks to the kitchen and says, "I'll test the theory by seeing if my clothes stop me from going to the kitchen." Dilbert sits at the kitchen table holding a sandwich. The table is covered with food: potato chips, fruit, soda, pickles, etc. He says, "Apparently my clothes are defective. Dogbert says, "Haven't I been saying that?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #chaos theory, #management, #name for it, #meeting, #confused, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

At the staff meeting, The Boss says, "From now on I'll be using the chaos theory of management." Wally, Dilbert, and Alice all have question marks over their heads and are confused. Wally says, "And this will be different how?" The Boss says, "Now there's a name for it."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #theory testing, #Dogbert, #people told what to do, #quit job, #build pyramid, #dolt, #honesty doesn't mix

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert sitting on couch while holding "TECH" magazine. Dogbert stands on arm of couch and thinks, "I will now test my theory that people like to be told what to do." Dogbert yells, "QUIT YOUR JOB AND BUILD ME A PYRAMID, YOU HOMELY DOLT!!!" Dilbert responds, "I liked it until the dolt part." Dogbert says, "I've noticed that honesty doesn't mix well with anything."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #astrologer, #project plan, #correct deciosn, #ignorance, #clouded judegment

View Transcript

Transcript

The boss says, to Alice "My atrologer told me to approve your project plan as is." Alice says, "What?! That's the right decision. What's going on here?" Alice says, to Dilbert over the cubicle wall, "My theory is that his ignorance clouded his poor judgement."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #cat bert, #evil, #eliminate traces, #individuality, #computer wallpaper, #helium

View Transcript

Transcript

Caption: "Catbert: Evil H.R. Director" Catbert types, "In order to eliminate all traces of individuality..." Dilbert reads, "All computer wallpaper must be the same." Dilbert thinks, "What next?" Catbert thinks, "In theory, with helium, the employees would all sound alike."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #the turnaround ceo, #mole, #fire, #affect revenue, #outsource everything, #one smart employee, #risk, #rude

View Transcript

Transcript

The Turnaround CEO The devilish looking CEO asks Dilbert, "Tell me, mole, who can I fire without affecting revenue?" Dilbert replies, "In theory, you could outsource everything and run the company with one smart employee." Dilbert continues, "And at the risk of sounding rude, only one of us knew that."