27 Times Comic Strips - Page 5

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

132 Results for 27 Times

View 41 - 50 results for 27 times comic strips. Discover the best "27 Times" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 31, 2010's comic on:


Tags #new job, #double workload, #hold papers, #complain, #exaggerate, #sit in chair

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice says, "Did I tell you I'm doing two jobs now?" Dilbert says, "About a million times." Dilbert says, "You've complained about it so much that it's like a song I can't get out of my head." Alice says, "I only found out yesterday." Dilbert says, "I'm trying to get ahead of it."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 01, 2009's comic on:


Tags #selling, #failure, #winning: models, #product, #options

View Transcript

Transcript

Asok says, "Our product comes with 27 moedels with over 9,000 options." Dilbert says, "Given my limited time to study the options, you have guaranteed that I will make a sub-optimal choice." Dilbert says, "Thanks for making me a failure." Asok says, Well it's not really "selling" if we both win."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 08, 2009's comic on:


Tags #talking, #telling, #story, #interrupted, #annoyed, #berating, #angry, #hijacked, #criticism, #ridicule, #ignoring

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert says, "And then Ted said he'd?" Man says, "Ho ho! I've seen that a million times!" Man says, "At my old job we used to make cricket noises whenever our manager was approaching." Man says, "But that doesn't mean you should cut corners when it comes to quality." Dilbert says, "You're hijacking our conversation!" Man says, "I'm adding value." Dilbert says, "You don't even know what we were talking about." Wally says, "Apparently you have a social disorder that compes you to insert irrelevant stories and trite observations into other people's conversations." Wally says, "I assume part of the disorder involves not being able to recognize it in yourself." Dilbert says, "I wonder if he can hear us." Man says, "Did I tell you about my camping trip?"

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 12, 2009's comic on:


Tags #asking, #project, #procrastination, #excuses, #stupidity, #lying

View Transcript

Transcript

The boss says, "Wally, are you done with your project yet?" Wally says, "I'll be done next week." The Boss says ,"You've said, 'Next week' for seven weeks in a row. What makes you think I'm going to believe it this time?" Wally says, "The first six times?"

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 18, 2009's comic on:


Tags #ceo, #conference, #meeting, #greed, #corruption, #illegal, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

CEO summit Dogbert says, "Obviously it's illegal for companies to rig bids." Dogbert says, "But interestingly, the crime is nearly impossible to prove when nothing is written down." Dogbert says, "I'd like you to meet Eddie. Pay close attention to how many times he stomps his hoof."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 29, 2009's comic on:


Tags #cruel, #employee, #co-worker, #complaining, #annoyed, #angry

View Transcript

Transcript

The boss says, "I hired an arrogant guy with a huge forehead. He's on your project." Dilbert says, "Great. Everything this guy says will seem more annoying than usual because of his huge forehead!" Man says, "I keep a wine glass with me at all times. I'm a foodie." Dilbert says, "Case in point!"

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 11, 2009's comic on:


Tags #dating, #flirting, #dinner, #afraid, #confused, #yelling, #relationships

View Transcript

Transcript

Woman says, "You're not my type. Why am I attracted to you? How did you do this, you monster!" Dilbert says, "In troubling economic times, my financial stability appeals to your survival instincts. It's basic evolution." Woman says, "Gaaa!!! That made me bored and aroused at the same time!" Dilbert says, "Science!"

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 14, 2008's comic on:


Tags #dogcart the ceo, #420 times, #smarter, #system is flawed, #contradicting your boss

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert the CEO Dogbert says, "I earn 420 times what you make. That means I'm 420 times smarter." A man says, "Actually, it means the system is deeply flawed." Dogbert says, "If you were 420 times smarter, you wouldn't be contradicting your boss right now."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 13, 2008's comic on:


Tags #dogcart the ceo, #salary, #400x more, #admit your selfish, #money

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert the CEO Dogbert says, "My salary is 400 times more than yours." Dogbert says, "My goal is to jack that up to 410, maybe 420." A woman says, "I hate you for this." Dogbert says, "So you admit you're selfish?"

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 16, 2008's comic on:


Tags #albanian inflation, #billion percent, #fetid water, #hyper inflation

View Transcript

Transcript

Elbonian inflation reaches a billion percent, daily An Elbonian says, "Is this enough for a small?" $ Fetid water! Another Elbonian says, "A minute ago, yes. Now it costs a hundred times more." The first Elbonian says, "Problem solved."