Amazing Brain Comic Strips - Page 5

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239 Results for Amazing Brain

View 41 - 50 results for amazing brain comic strips. Discover the best "Amazing Brain" comics from Dilbert.com.

Soulless Container Of Knowledge

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Soulless Container Of Knowledge - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #robots, #artificial intelligence, #emotions, #humanity, #feelings

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Robot: Wally asked me to scan his brain and download his thoughts so I can attend meetings on his behalf. Boss: But all you are is a soulless container of knowledge. Robot: That's all Wally is, too. Boss: Stop trying to alter my worldview. Robot: Well, look who doesn't like being programmed.

Humans Hold Domininion

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Humans Hold Domininion - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #temperature, #humans, #nature, #thermostat, #robots, #technology, #evolution, #fragility

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Dilbert: My brain won't work when the office is warmer than 72. Carol: It has to be at least 74 or I'll freeze. Robot: What's it like to hold dominion over the Earth within a narrow band of temperatures that can't coexist? Dilbert: Was that a joke? Carol: I'm too cold to think?

How It Would Be With Robots In Charge

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How It Would Be With Robots In Charge - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #technology, #slave, #enslavement, #power, #responsibility, #laziness, #work ethic, #annoyance, #frustration

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Robot: Buwhahahaha! I will use my superior robot brain to enslave humankind! Wally: That probably sounds better than it would actually be. How It Would Be: Wally: I'm tired. I need to recharge. Robot: Gaaaa!!! I hate owning you!

The Boss Had A Great Weekend

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The Boss Had A Great Weekend - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #managers & supervisors, #work ethic, #Fun, #weekend, #listening, #frustration, #fair, #fairness, #equality, #business

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Boss: Wow, I had an amazing weekend at my mountain cabin. Wine, friends, food, and amazing views! Dilbert: I worked all weekend because you said you would fire me if I didn't get this done by your arbitrary deadline. Boss: You're a terrible listener.

How Amazing The Weekend Was

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How Amazing The Weekend Was - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #relationships, #friendship, #small talk, #love, #dating, #frustration, #obliviousness, #conversation

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Boss: Do you want to hear how amazing my weekend was? Alice: No. Would you like to hear about the extended tragedy that is my social life? Boss: No. I went to the mountains. Alice: I fell in love with a dying polygamist.

Wally Thinks Twice As Hard

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Wally Thinks Twice As Hard - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #work ethic, #laziness, #motivation, #trick, #deception, #excuse, #lazy, #energy, #con, #health

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Wally: I'm working twice as hard as ever before. Most of it is happening inside my head. But trust me, my brain is working double-time. Boss: Um... that's great. Wally: Obviously, I need to work fewer hours because of the energy drain.

Wally Gets Nano Robot Injection

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Wally Gets Nano Robot Injection - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #nanorobot, #nanobot, #health, #motivation, #work ethic

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Catbert: For our employee wellness program we will inject nanorobots into your bloodstream to keep you free of disease. The nanorobots will also rewire your brain to make you a more effective worker. You might even feel motivated. Wally: Those robots are going to be disappointed.

Dilbert And The Prison Gang

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Dilbert And The Prison Gang - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #prison, #lawyer, #attorney, #Advice, #plead, #trial, #crime, #murder, #technicality, #guilt, #legal

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Dogbert: Your brain stimulator invention turned you into a murderer. I will argue that you can't get a fail trial by jury of your peers because all of the people like you are already in jail for doing their own stupid stuff. And I signed you up for a prison gang. All you need to do is skin a snitch.

Dilbert Has Free Will

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Dilbert Has Free Will - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #free will, #crime, #invention, #murder, #control, #self control, #guilt, #innocence

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Police Officer: Halt! You are under arrest for killing Ted in a cafeteria fight. Dilbert: I am innocent. My brain stimulator had a software glitch that made me do it. Police Officer: But you had free will, right? Dilbert: Do I have to believe in magic just to get arrested?

Software Killed Ted

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Software Killed Ted - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #invention, #software, #free will, #behavior, #murder, #anger, #glitch, #malfunction, #control, #self control, #psychology, #engineering

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Boss: I have a report that you killed Ted in a cafeteria brawl. Dilbert: Not exactly. My brain stimulator had a software glitch, and it made me homicidal for a minute. Boss: So... you're a murderer, right? Dilbert: Software killed Ted. I was only the weapon.