Badger For Answer Comic Strips - Page 5

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

169 Results for Badger For Answer

View 41 - 50 results for badger for answer comic strips. Discover the best "Badger For Answer" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #temper, #anger, #calm, #email, #frustration, #internet, #communication, #reaction, #technology

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice: What the... Dilbert: It's not a good idea to answer email while you're angry. Alice: I know, but this idiot... Dilbert: Hold... That's it. Deep breaths. Hold... Hold... Alice: Phew! You were right. I should not get worked up over one idiot. He wasn't working alone! Dilbert: I'm out.

People Get Dumber When Sitting Down

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
People Get Dumber When Sitting Down - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #intelligence, #dumb, #belief, #furniture, #new age, #science, #metaphysics

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Is it my imagination or do people get dumber when they sit down for a meeting? Or would you say you are equally dumb no matter what you are doing? Boss: Well, I'm no scientist, but I'm pretty sure feng shui is part of the answer.

Dilbert Eats A Berry

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Dilbert Eats A Berry - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #google, #internet, #off the grid, #question, #query, #allergy, #berry, #reaction, #swelling, #anaphylaxis, #technology

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert goes off the grid: minute three. Dilbert: I wish I could Google this berry before eating it. What's the worst that could happen? Wow. This is a very specific answer to my question.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #social media, #facebook, #twitter, #pinterest, #instagram, #obliviousness, #technology, #communication

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Do you have a minute to answer a quick question about social media? Dilbert: I don't have time... Boss: Real quick. One question. Dilbert: Okay, but make it fast, please. I'm late for my meeting. Boss: Okay, the question is this... Can I Instagram a tweet right to Facebook... or does liking something I also favorited automatically pin it to my followers? Dilbert: I'm going to say yes and go to my meeting. Boss: I probably should have asked some follow-ups.

Ceo Returns From The Afterlife

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Ceo Returns From The Afterlife - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #afterlife, #angel, #ceos, #demon, #evil, #executives, #good, #good vs. evil, #returning from the dead

View Transcript

Transcript

CEO: I returned from the afterlife and I'm taking back my job as CEO. Dilbert: So... you're an angel? CEO: I set all of the thermostats to 140 degrees. Let's see how long it takes you to answer your own question.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #criticism, #frankness, #goals, #honesty, #managers, #root cause, #bad parenting, #pointy headed boos, #underlings, #rapidly evolving nature, #talented employee, #boss life story

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: You haven't achieved any of your goals for the year. What is up with that? Dilbert: Do you want an explanation that goes back to the root cause? Boss: Of course. Dilbert: The problem started years ago, when two idiots unwisely created a third smaller idiot. They compounded their mistake with bad parenting. The toddler ate candy and sniffed wet paint until he became a pointy-headed boss. The pointy-headed boss set goals for his underlings that ignored the rapidly evolving nature of the industry. Then he got angry at his most talented employee for giving an accurate answer to a question. Boss: I hate you. Dilbert: Nothing could halt the downward spiral.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #capitalism, #cruelty, #executives, #industry & manufacturing, #manufacturing, #meat, #announcements, #artificial meat prodcut, #automated robots, #senior management, #manufacturing employees, #engineering

View Transcript

Transcript

CEO: The company has two exciting announcements. We are launching a new artificial meat product. In unrelated news, our manufacturing plant is now fully automated by robots. Wow. It got quiet in here. Dilbert: I don't want to say we have no trust in senior management, but... did you order the robots to kill all of the manufacturing employees and turn them into a meat product? CEO: Before I answer that, can we agree that capitalism has some rough edges?

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #annoy, #annoyance, #corpse, #escalade, #experience, #inexperience, #murder, #premeditated murder, #prototype, #scientific, #strangle, #boss

View Transcript

Transcript

Inexperienced Guy. Coworker: Can you answer some questions about our product prototype? Alice: No, but I would be happy to strangle you with your own lanyard and put your corpse in my boss' Escalade to frame him for the crime. Coworker: That scenario is alarmingly specific. Alice: For this sort of thing, premeditated is the way to go.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #deception, #email, #insulting, #intelligence, #iq, #trickery, #work ethic, #obession, #addiction, #work smarter, #text, #efficiency

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: Studies show that continually checking email lowers your functional I.Q. You advised me to "work smarter," so I plan to ignore all of your email from now on. Boss: What if I text you instead? Wally: That's the sort of question that one asks after checking email too often. Boss: Did you just insult me? Wally: That answer is in your email. Boss: Where is it? I don't see any email from you. But I see six new emails that look important. What were we talking about. Wally: You were complimenting me on my efficiency.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #electronic mail, #mobile (cell) phones, #instant message, #emailed, #texted, #personal phone, #called, #inperson, #negate, #ignore, #push away, #no answer, #excuses

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: You never answered my IM. Alice: You should have emailed me. Dilbert: I did. You didn't answer my email. Alice: If it was so important, you should have texted me. Dilbert: You didn't answer my texts. Alice; You have to text my personal phone. Dilbert: You didn't answer those texts either. Alice: Had it been important, you would have called me. Dilbert: I did. You didn't answer your phone and you don't return calls. So here I am. Alice: It's premature to get your hopes up.