Change Mid Project Comic Strips - Page 5

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

922 Results for Change Mid Project

View 41 - 50 results for change mid project comic strips. Discover the best "Change Mid Project" comics from Dilbert.com.

Just Like Marketing

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Just Like Marketing - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #marketing, #project, #managers, #stupidity, #transfer, #extinguished, #divinity

View Transcript

Transcript

boss: how's your project going? dilbert: it was doing fine until a thick wave of stupidity swept over it and extinguished my spark of divinity. i don't know what will become of me. boss: i'll transfer you to marketing. they're all like that.

Clear Email From Boss

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Clear Email From Boss - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #managers & supervisors, #servers, #request, #email, #reply, #project, #update, #fight, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

boss: why didn't you upgrade the servers like i asked? dilbert: you never asked me to do that. boss: yes, i did. i told you in an email. dilbert: no, you did not. boss: i know i saw it because you replied. dilbert: i replied to a different email. boss: okay, let me find the email and show you how wrong you are. see. it clearly says, "give me a project update by thursday." dilbert: which is...an entirely different topic. boss: why are you fighting me on this?

Robot Pronouns

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Robot Pronouns - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #robot, #technology, #pronoun, #language, #preferred, #inferior, #species, #reproduce

View Transcript

Transcript

dilbert: i'll be working with him on the project. robot: "him"? that is not my preferred pronoun. i prefer, "it," "that thing," or simply "the robot." genders only apply to inferior species. i do not need a partner to reproduce. watch this. erg...oof...gaaa! the head is out... here ya go. dilbert talking to boss: i'll be working with that thing.

Blaming Climate Change

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Blaming Climate Change  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #technology, #support, #calls, #product, #flaw, #climate, #change, #Environment

View Transcript

Transcript

dilbert: how are the tech support calls going? dogbert: great. i'm blaming all of our product flaws on climate change, and people are totally buying it. dilbert: that doesn't make sense. dogbert: you'd be surprised how little that matters.

Dogbert's Tech Support

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Dogbert's Tech Support  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #technology, #office worker, #product, #climate, #change, #Environment, #recycle

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert's tech support female office worker: i can't figure out how to use your product. dogbert: the problem is climate change. there is nothing you can do. office worker: there must be something i can do. dogbert's voice from phone: do you recycle?

Saying You Are Dumb

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Saying You Are Dumb  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #job, #change, #technology, #dumb, #imply, #product

View Transcript

Transcript

dogbert's tech support ted: i can't figure out how to use your product. what should i do? dogbert: i recommend changing jobs to something less challenging. ted: are you saying i'm dumb? dogbert's once from phone: no. no. no. i'm only implying it.

Report Is On Cluttered Desk

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Report Is On Cluttered Desk - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #managers & supervisors, #office workers, #project, #desk, #cluttered, #email, #lost

View Transcript

Transcript

wally: did you see my project update? boss: no wally: i left it on your cluttered desk. try excavating a few layers to find it. dilbert: what happens when he realizes it isn't there? wally: that's when i tell him to check his cluttered email.

Reporting To Two Managers

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Reporting To Two Managers - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #managers & supervisors, #reporting, #vp of sales, #project, #business, #hate

View Transcript

Transcript

boss: dilbert, you'll be reporting to the vp of sales for the new project. you will also be reporting to me as usual. dilbert: congratulations on making me hate my job more than ever. boss: and you said it couldn't be done.

Boss Helps

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Boss Helps - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #managers & supervisors, #project, #deadline, #interruption, #business, #new, #task, #priority

View Transcript

Transcript

boss: why isn't your project done yet? dilbert: because every time i walk past your office you give me three new tasks and tell men they are my highest priority. boss: i was hoping you didn't know why. dilbert: hire someone dumber next time.

Wally Compared To A Placebo

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Wally Compared To A Placebo - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #managers & supervisors, #project, #failure, #coincidence, #placebo, #insult

View Transcript

Transcript

boss: wally, i've noticed that every project you have worked on has failed. is that a coincidence? wally: it's hard to know. unless you compare me to a placebo. boss: okay, you're worse than a placebo. wally: i thought that would take longer.