Commute To Sit In Box Comic Strips - Page 5

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

812 Results for Commute To Sit In Box

View 41 - 50 results for commute to sit in box comic strips. Discover the best "Commute To Sit In Box" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #anger, #stress, #alice, #computer, #office, #always stressed out, #employees, #introdcutions, #glass box, #reactions, #warning, #technology, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: This is Alice. You need to know two things about her. When she feels stressed-out she gets angry. Alice: Tell him the second thing! Dilbert: She's always stressed-out.

View more books now

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #christmas, #christmas presents, #physics, #quantum mechanics, #interpretation, #cat in box, #airholes, #holiday

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert: Merry Christmas! This gift is based on the Copenhagen interpretation of quantum mechanics. There's a cat in here that's neither dead nor alive. Dilbert: Where are the airholes? Dogbert: I have control issues.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #electronic mail, #thinking, #lack of creativity, #choke yourself, #creating ideas

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: I traced all of our problems back to your lack of creativity. You should be creating ideas that change the course of civilization, but instead, you sit there like a lump. Dilbert: I'm sending you a link that describes fun ways to choke yourself.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #competition (psychology), #thinking, #ceos technology challenge, #innovative ideas, #fresh water, #elbonia, #award winning ideas, #water in a box

View Transcript

Transcript

CEO: I'm proud to announce the winner in the CEO's technology challenge. Two weeks ago, I challenged you to come up with innovative ideas for getting fresh water to Elbonia. The winner is someone named Wally. Wally's idea for bringing fresh water to Elbonia is... "in a box." That's the best one? Boss: We only had one entry. CEO: I hate your bald guts. Wally: I get that a lot. If you need me, I'll be in my cubicle thinking up award-winning ideas.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #illness, #laziness, #sitting disease, #sit all day, #bad health, #safety more eimportant, #drink coffee instead

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: I've got a bad case of something the experts call "sitting disease." Studies show that people who sit all day for their jobs have 40% greater chance of dying in the next three years. Company policy says safety is more important than productivity, right? Boss: Um... sort of. Wally: So instead of sitting at my desk working, I plan to walk around and drink coffee. For safety reasons. Boss: GO sit at your desk or you're fired. There's a good chance this problem will resolve itself within three years.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #complaining, #happiness, #tasks, #people, #commute, #paid less, #nothing about job, #psychology

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I like my job. But I don't like any of the tasks... or any of the people... I don't like the commute... and I'm paid less than I'm worth... and I'm not making the world a better place. Dogbert: Are you sure you like your job? Dilbert: Why do you ask?

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #complaining, #obstinacy, #peer coaching, #trendy, #complain, #insightful questions, #cause problems, #respoinsible

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice: Who's up for some peer coaching? Dilbert: What? Alice: It's the latest thing. Dilbert: Then it must be good. Alice: I'll complain about all of my work problems while you sit there and listen. Then you'll ask insightful questions that will cause me to come up with my own solutions. Dilbert: Okay. Have you considered the possibility that you cause all of your own problems by um... being you? Alice: You're terrible at this But that's not surprise because you're terrible at most things. I hope you die badly. Dilbert: Do I ask another insightful question now?

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #death & dying, #negotiating, #work ethic, #raise, #workload, #incentive, #work harder, #disgruntled, #no meaning, #dreams lie broken

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: If you finish your project in twelve months, I'll give you a five percent raise. Dilbert: I would gladly give up five percent of my future pay to avoid a doubling of my workload. Boss: You don't understand. I'm giving you an incentive to work harder. Dilbert: No, I'm pretty sure you're charging me five percent of my future pay to sit here and feel disgruntled. And it's working. I hate you more than ever and I no longer find meaning in my work My dreams lie broken and empty beneath the ruins of my optimism. Boss: I can't tell if your negotiating or dying. Dilbert: It's a little of both.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #work ethic, #planned power outage, #office, #dedication, #stupid

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: There will be a planned power outage all day tomorrow. But I want all of you to come to the office and sit at your desks in case our CEO stops by. Dilbert: Because he likes it when we act stupid? Boss: It's better for everyone if we call it dedication.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #annoyance, #cubicle, #in box, #neat cubicle, #document, #on chair, #desk chair

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice: Gaaa!!! Every time I leave my cubicle, someone puts a document on my chair! I have an in-ox! Stop leaving stuff in my chair!!! Dilbert: How do you keep your cubicle so neat? Wally: I put everything on Alice's chair.