Do Marketing Things Comic Strips - Page 5

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

638 Results for Do Marketing Things

View 41 - 50 results for do marketing things comic strips. Discover the best "Do Marketing Things" comics from Dilbert.com.

Best In The Industry

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Best In The Industry - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #headphones, #best, #persuading, #humor, #confused, #jokes

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: The headphones we make are the best in the industry. Man: Our marketing campaign will focus on how they cure brain tumors and raise your IQ. Dilbert: They don't do any of that. Man: This is exactly why we don't let engineers do marketing.

Marketing Lies

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Marketing Lies - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #boss, #headphones, #competition, #meeting, #marketing, #lies

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Our new headphones product is better than the competition in every way. Boss: Excellent. I'll get marketing involved to tell a bunch of lies about all of that. Dilbert: Why would they need to lie? Boss: They're kind of set in their ways.

Dilbert Feels Overwhelmed

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Dilbert Feels Overwhelmed - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #life, #office, #office workers, #panic, #overwhelmed

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I'm feeling overwhelmed by all the things I need to get done. Boss: Have you tried eliminating your personal life? Dilbert: That took care of itself. Boss: Okay, that's the only idea I had.

Adjust The Data

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Adjust The Data - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business ethics, #engineering, #managers & supervisors, #office, #research, #tests, #data

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: The test data doesn't support our plan. Boss: We know our plan is brilliant, so just adjust the data to support it. Dilbert: You mean falsify the data. Boss: Let's not get hung up on the definition of things.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #avoidance, #irritation, #lunch, #office workers, #relationships, #coworkers

View Transcript

Transcript

Tina: You should meet the new guy in marketing. You two would get along great. I'll set up a lunch. Dilbert: Why? Tina: Because he reminds me of you. Dilbert:That isn't a reason. Tina: Okay, he is free tomorrow for lunch. I'll tell him to meet you in the lobby. Dilbert: I still don't see why the three of us need to go to lunch. Tina: It's just the two of you. I'm busy tomorrow. Man: I hear you're a lot like me. Dilbert: Sadly, yes.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #communication, #frustrated, #office, #office workers, #talking

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Did Alice talk to you about the cost estimates? Ted: Mumble mumble. Dilbert: I can't hear you. Ted: Mumble mumble!!! Dilbert: Now you're just mumbling louder. Ted: Mumble mumble. Dilbert: Maybe you could turn toward me when you mumble and I can try to read your lips. Ted: Mumble mumble. Dilbert: I'm getting something about grapes, windshields, asthma, and blockchain. Ted: I didn't say any of those things. Dilbert: Okay. I understood that sentence. Now answer my question the same way. Ted: Mumble mumble.

Dilbert Teaches The Dumb People

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Dilbert Teaches The Dumb People - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #computers, #insults, #marketing, #office workers, #sales, #teaching, #smart

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: My boss asked me to teach a class on coding because it is hard to find programmers in this job market. Are there any smart people in the class or do you all work in marketing and sales? Voice: What's that supposed to mean? Dilbert: Thank you. Is anyone else in sales?

Anticipate Problems

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Anticipate Problems - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Wally, #anticipate, #finishing, #friday, #punctual, #anticipating, #things, #problems

View Transcript

Transcript

Man: Do you anticipate any problems finishing by Friday? Wally: I do not. Man: Is that because you're punctual or because you aren't good at anticipating things? Wally: I don't foresee any unforeseen problems. Man: Okay. Wait...

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #man, #criticizing, #face, #head, #arrogance, #toxic, #personality, #garbage, #plague, #legs, #truth, #power, #behind, #back

View Transcript

Transcript

Man: I heard you were criticizing me behind my back. Try saying those things to my face! Dilbert: Okay. You're a hot-headed know-nothing who uses his arrogance to mask his total lack of talent. You ruin every meeting with your toxic personality. Every project you touch turns to garbage you're like a plague with legs. Man: Okay... That was harsh, but I respect you for speaking truth to power. Dilbert: You don't have any power. Man: Maybe it's better if you talk behind my back.

Unmotivated Staff

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Unmotivated Staff - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Catbert, #the boss, #wrong, #leadership, #skills

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss: A few months ago, I realized my staff was unmotivated and working on all the wrong things. It took all of my leadership skills to get them motivated again. Catbert: Are they still doing the wrong things? The Boss: Faster than ever.