Doctor Is Vet Comic Strips - Page 5
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Doctor says, "You have a wicked case of sympathetic Powerpoint proboscis." Doctor says, "Your nose grows when anyone lies during a business presentation." Asok says, "Sorry. The sales forecast seemed optimistic."
Doctor says, "He survived because his pointy hair cushioned the impact." Doctor says, "Please resist the urge to fiddle with the cool machines that keep him alive." Alice says, "Maybe we can make him smarter." Wally says, "What's this do?"
The Boss says, "I can't tell the difference between urban legends and reality." Doctor says, "I'll need your social security number so I can tell the government not to count any votes you cast." The Boss says, "You can do that?" Doctor says, "Here're some pills that look exactly like tic tacs."
Doctor says, "These pills should get rid of the wings that the last pills gave you as a side effect. Doctor says, "It's an off-label use, but I have a good feeling about it." Dilbert says, "What now?" Doctor says, "At this point, sinning is your best bet."
Man says, "I need you to take these pills because the pharmaceutical rep is smoking hot." Man says, "It might have some side effects, but the 'Guy code' says you have to be my wingman if I ask." Dilbert says, "Apparently he subscribes to a literal interpretation of the guy code."
Man says, "My prescription meds cause drowsiness." Man says, "So I got a second prescription that causes phantom-hand syndrome to slap me at random intervals." Alice says, "Maybe you should use a doctor who has less-effective pharmaceutical reps in his territory." Man says, "Fist!"
Dilbert: I'm addicted to the internet because it's more interesting than people. Is there a pill you can give to everyone else to make them more interesting? Doctors never want to treat the underlying problem.
Dilbert says, "My doctor says everything is fine except for the part of my brain that controls morality." The Boss says, "Gasp! The management prophesies are true. You must be the one they call..." Catbert says, "THE NATURAL?!!" The Boss says, "He glows from within."
Dilbert: I need a doctor's note for the two days of work I missed." Doctor: You look healthy to me. Dilbert: I got better. Doctor: how do I know you were sick? Dilbert: The note just needs to say I was sick. Doctor: so you want me to lie?" It's not a lie. I really was sick. Medical Doctor: If your company doesn't trust you, why should I?" Dilbert: Good point. What if I let the people in your waiting room cough on me? Then you can write a note saying I have what they have. Doctor: As long as I didn't recommend it. I think that passes ethical muster." The Boss: You have nine diseases?" Dilbert: That have names.
Dilbert: He was violating my personal space and his head got stuck in my ear." "You need a huge yawn to open the ear canal so he can get out." Tina: Yes, I do have lots of pictures of my porcelain frog collection. Why do you ask?"