Huge Time Saver Comic Strips - Page 5

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View 41 - 50 results for huge time saver comic strips. Discover the best "Huge Time Saver" comics from Dilbert.com.

Time Travel By Printer

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Time Travel By Printer - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #presentation, #technolgy, #molecular, #scan, #body, #brain, #time travel, #3d print, #meeting

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dilbert giving a presentation: i invented a device that can scan your body and brain at molecular level. now you can time travel by killing yourself and leaving instructions to 3d-print you back to life in the future when the technology is able. response: where will you find anyone dumb enough to test it? dilbert: have you ever attended a meeting at this company?

Two Places At Once

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Two Places At Once - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #managers & supervisors, #business, #meeting, #time, #states, #impossible

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dilbert: you committed me to two different meetings at the same time in different states. it is not possible to be in two places at the same time wally: pfft! i could do it boss: even wally could do it

Practice Makes Perfect

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Practice Makes Perfect - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #managers & supervisors, #practice, #estimate, #errors, #business, #incorrect

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boss: how can i trust your estimate when you have been wrong every other time? wally: practice makes perfect boss: um... boss thinking: i just realized i don't know how anything works.

Lifestyle Disagreer

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Lifestyle Disagreer - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #argument, #conversation, #office workers, #sarcasm, #disagreement, #attitude

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Man: I hear what you're saying, and I disagree. Dilbert: Because...? Man: Because what? Dilbert: Do you have any reasons for your disagreement? Man: No, I'm a lifestyle disagreer. I disagree with everyone all the time. The reasons are irrelevant. Dilbert: You sound smart. Man: No. I'm not smart. Dilbert: And you're attractive too. Man: No. I'm ugl...okay, I see what you're doing.

Casserole For Pot Luck

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Casserole For Pot Luck  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Food, #health & safety, #office, #office workers, #casserole, #potluck, #inspection, #home, #kitchen

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tina: i brought a casserole for the potluck. when are you coming? dilbert: when was the last time the health department did an inspection of your home kitchen? tina: never dilbert: that's when i'll be going to the potluck.

Leadership Conference In Maui

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Leadership Conference In Maui - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #boss, #irritation, #managers & supervisors, #vacations

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Boss: The leadership conference is in Maui next week. I need you to sit in for me...and do your own job at the same time. While I'm drinking on the beach. Dilbert: I get it!!!

Zombie Projects

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Zombie Projects - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #office, #zombie, #sloth, #fail, #salary

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the boss: wally, i'm putting you in charge of all the zombie projects that refuse to die. the boss: i'm counting on your sloth and incompetence to finish them off, so management feels comfortable finally canceling them. the boss: as of today, i'm paying you to fail. wally: actually, this is just the first time you're aware of it.

Employee Engagement

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Employee Engagement - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #employees, #managers & supervisors, #office, #time, #engagement

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the boss: i'm assigning you to work on our employee engagement initiative. dilbert: does it matter that i think that project sounds like a complete waste of time? the boss: nah.

First Time Doing Marketing

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First Time Doing Marketing - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #business ethics, #criminals, #marketing, #office

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dilbert, dogbert and the boss at conference room table. dogbert: your competition has a superior product, but you can compensate by branding them as evil. dilbert: we can say they charge too much. dogbert: or...we can say their leather cases are made from the skin of executed criminals. dilbert: but that would not be true. dogbert: first time doing marketing?

Leadership And Guessing

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Leadership And Guessing - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #coffee, #managers & supervisors, #office

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alice to the boss: one option is to use the old method that has never once worked, but we think we know how to make it work next time. alice: the other option is to try something new that we can't be sure will work. alice: it's almost as if leadership is nothing but guessing. the boss drinking coffee: let's change the subject.