Idea To Eliminate Comic Strips - Page 5

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368 Results for Idea To Eliminate

View 41 - 50 results for idea to eliminate comic strips. Discover the best "Idea To Eliminate" comics from Dilbert.com.

Wally Has An Idea

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Wally Has An Idea - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Wally, #alice, #Dilbert, #coffee, #work, #criteria, #criticism

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Wally: I have an idea on how to fix our process. Alice: I've noticed that all of your ideas make everyone but you work harder. Wally: Apparently, we have different criteria for what makes an idea great.

A One Variable World

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A One Variable World - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #topper, #Dilbert, #genius, #rejection, #variable, #cost

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Topper: I reject your idea because the costs are high. Dilbert: In a one-variable world, you would be a genius. Topper: Thank you. Dilbert: I meant every word of it.

Feedback From Twitter Guy

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Feedback From Twitter Guy  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #feedback, #criticism, #social media, #twitter, #tweet, #troll, #technology

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Dilbert: Do you have any feedback on my idea? Man: Yes. You're weak and stupid, and everyone you love will end up in jail. Dilbert: Do you spend a lot of time on Twitter? Man: Is that a lucky guess or are you spying on me?

Lying To Weasels

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Lying To Weasels - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #sayings, #Advice, #honesty, #truthfulness

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Dilbert: I keep speaking truth to power, but it isn't working for me. Wally: Try lying to weasels. It doesn't look as good on a bumper sticker but it gets the job done. Dilbert: That sounds like a terrible idea. Wally: Then why are you doing it right now?

Idea Stealing

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Idea Stealing - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #idea, #manager, #credit

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Boss: What does everyone think of my idea? Dilbert: I suggested that same idea last week and you said it was terrible. Boss: Your idea was totally different because it involved you getting the credit.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #memory, #demagoguery, #social media, #Opinion, #technology

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Man: You said you hated this idea last week, but now you say you like it. How do you explain your flip-flopping? Dilbert: I always liked the idea. Nothing changed. Man: Hahaha! Nice try! You're back-pedaling because I busted you. Dilbert: Here is my email trail from the first moment the idea came up. As you can plainly see, I have liked the idea from the start. Any questions? Boss: Why is it so hard for you to admit you were wrong?

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #training, #frustration, #wasting time

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Man: Thank you all for coming to this mandatory class on using the new system. The new system installation is behind schedule, so I'll train you using the old system. Dilbert: we know how to use the old system. Man: I'll point out how the new system is different as we go. Dilbert: Is the new system a lot like the old system? Man: No. Totally different. Dilbert: This is the worst idea I've ever heard. Man: Here are some handouts from the old system's operating guide. Dilbert: This is the Japanese language part of the manual. Man: Are you going to complain about everything?

No Good Ideas In Decades

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No Good Ideas In Decades - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #ideas, #candid, #ageism, #conversation, #speaking, #talking

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Man: May I make a suggestion? Dilbert: Sure. Do you mind if I only pretend to listen because you haven't had a good idea in several decades? Man: That's fine. I was only looking forward to the part where I'm talking. Dilbert: Proceed.

Bad Analogies

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Bad Analogies - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #ideas, #criticism, #critique, #simile, #language

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Man: Your idea is awful. Dilbert: Can you explain your reasons without using an absurd analogy? Man: It's like a pregnant squirrel eating a sandwich. Dilbert: I'll take that as a no.

Someone Stole Phb's Idea

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 Someone Stole Phb's Idea - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #ideas, #patent, #copyright, #invention, #credit

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Boss: Hey! Someone stole my product idea! Dilbert: To be fair, your idea would have been obvious to a monkey with a drinking problem. Boss: But a monkey couldn't build this product. Dilbert: Neither can you. Let's call it a tie.