Product Comic Strips - Page 5

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385 Results for Product

View 41 - 50 results for product comic strips. Discover the best "Product" comics from Dilbert.com.

Wally Finds Critical Bug

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Wally Finds Critical Bug - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags big business, bug, deception, insider trading, stock, trick

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Wally: I found a critical bug in our software that could make our product worthless in a week. If you give me a huge raise, I won't tell anyone about the problem until you sell all of your company stock. Boss: Deal! Narrator: Two weeks later. Boss: Why haven't I heard about the bug yet? Wally: You didn't ask me if I knew how to fix it.

Insurance For Phones

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Insurance For Phones  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags cell phone, technology, insurance, break, screen, cracked

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Dilbert: The company that insures our mobile phone product is angry because 100 percent of our phones break in the first minute. They say it's a disaster and it is putting them out of business. What should I tell them? Boss: Tell them they should have gotten some sort of insurance.

Cracked Screen

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Cracked Screen  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags phone, cell phone, fragile, design, screen, case, technology

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Dilbert: Introducing our new mobile phone product, the BSB 100. BSB stands for Beautiful, Slippery, and Brittle. Oops. Voice: What's the 100 stand for? Dilbert: That's how many times you'll have to replace a cracked screen.

Beautiful, Slippery, Brittle

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Beautiful, Slippery, Brittle   - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags technology, cell phones, fragile, aesthetics, vanity

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Boss: When you engineer our new mobile phone product, make sure you adhere to the BSB design principle. Dilbert: BSB? Boss: Beautiful, slippery, brittle. Dilbert: Isn't that sort of evil? Boss: It isn't our fault if customers don't buy an ugly case.

Product Is Too Addictive

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Product Is Too Addictive  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags social media, technology, facebook, twitter, addiction, big business, impulse control

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Dilbert: I'm worried that we designed our product to be too addictive. Now we're more like a disease than a consumer product. Boss: Will you stop talking like that if I give you a raise? Dilbert: It's worth a try.

Watch That Monitors Health

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Watch That Monitors Health - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags health, wearable tech, fitbit, fitness, monitor, surveillance

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Boss: Our new product is a watch that monitors every aspect of your health. Wearing the watch is mandatory for all employees. Your data will automatically stream to our cloud storage. Voice: Because you care about our health? Boss: Sure. We'll go with that.

Barry Dingle Asks About Blockchain

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Barry Dingle Asks About Blockchain - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags questioning, time, quick question

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Barry: I see you're off your phone. Can I pop in and ask a quick question? Boss: Yes, but only if it is quick. Barry: Oh, it will be. Boss: Okay, make it quick. Barry: What is blockchain and how will it influence our strategy across all product lines?

Fix It With Marketing

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Fix It With Marketing - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags marketing, lying, ethics, advertising, deception, business

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Dilbert: Our product has fewer features and a higher price compared to our competitors. Boss: We'll fix that with a little thing I call "marketing." Dilbert: Lying is unethical. Boss: That's why we only mislead.

Product Warning Is Too Long

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Product Warning Is Too Long - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags technical writer, instructions, caution, warning, safety, criticism

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Tina: My boss, who knows nothing about technical writing, told me to cut my 700-page product warning down to 500 pages. He doesn't appreciate my art. Dilbert: Sounds like both of you are idiots. Tina: This will go smoother if you stop talking.

500 Pages Would Be Rubbish

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500 Pages Would Be Rubbish - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags writing, criticism, technical writer, warning, caution, safety

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Boss: You need to edit the product warning from seven hundred pages down to one. Tina: Oh, that's rich. I'ma professional technical writer, and you're telling me how to write? Boss: Can you cut it down to 500 pages? Tina: Sure, if you want it to be total rubbish.