Pummel Each Applicat Comic Strips - Page 5

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

235 Results for Pummel Each Applicat

View 41 - 50 results for pummel each applicat comic strips. Discover the best "Pummel Each Applicat" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #anger, #engineers, #wages, #start up, #million each, #under paid, #money, #salray, #paid workers

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: This is one of the engineers that works at the start-up we purchased. We bought the company just to get the engineers. Basically, each engineer cost us a million dollars. Dilbert: I'm so underpaid! Engineer: That money didn't go to me!

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #complaining, #ignorance (knowledge), #product features, #hodge podge, #complexity, #teamwork

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I added all of the product features that each of you demanded. Now our product is a worthless hodgepodge of complexity. I appreciate your input. I couldn't have failed without you. Boss: Teamwork!

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #managers & supervisors, #tailored style, #each employee, #pool cue, #leadership is guessing, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: A good manager tailors his leadership style to fit each employee. In your case, I think the best approach involves poling you with a sharpened pool cue. To be perfectly honest, a big part of leadership is guessing.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #shared leadership, #model, #piece of role, #blame

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: I'm moving to a shared leadership model. Each of you will take on one piece of the leadership role. Dilbert: What's my piece? Boss: Let's see. I have you down for something called... blame.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #ineffective, #nemesis, #physics of work, #quarreling

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: My old nemesis retired, so I asked Randy to take over that function because he's ineffective at everything he does. Coworker: Huh? Dilbert: The physics of work required that each employee be matched with an anti-employee called a nemesis. Coworker: I don't know who my nemesis is. Wally: Uh-oh. You got a hider. They're the worst.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #best decison, #conference room, #listed reasons, #review, #thinking, #vendor, #work, #writing

View Transcript

Transcript

Man: Why are you picking this vendor? Dilbert: I listed the four reasons. Individually, each reason would not be compelling. But viewed as a whole, this is the best decision. This first reason is weak. Dilbert: And here we go.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #depression (mental state), #despair, #ugly partment, #two ugly roomates, #ugly bus, #ugly building, #ugly cubicle, #eat lunch

View Transcript

Transcript

Asok: I live in an ugly apartment with two ugly roommates. Each workday I take an ugly bus to an ugly building and spend the entire day in my ugly cubicle. Dilbert: At least you get to eat lunch with us. Asok: I've said too much.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #choosing, #meetings, #creative ideas, #next prodcut, #ignorance on public disply, #cost money, #increase risk, #evaluate each idea, #disdain, #good idea

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: We need creative ideas for our next product. But not from you. Your ideas are awful. And don't suggest something that is already being done. That just puts your ignorance on public display. I don't want to hear any ideas that cost money or increase risk. As usual, I'll evaluate each idea by repeating it slowly while I look at your with disdain. If you come up with a good idea, I'll let you take on the project in addition to your existing work. Who wants to go first? How did I hire so many people who have no ideas? Catbert: Probably bad luck.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #couples, #dating, #play games, #guess the lie, #say 2 things, #dating games, #obvious things, #relationships

View Transcript

Transcript

Woman: Let's play a game. We each say two things about ourselves and the other has to guess which one is a lie. Dilbert: I love to play games like that. My second thing is that I eat food.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business ethics, #clubs, #meetings, #society for the preservation of evil ideas, #file patents, #sue for infringement, #embezzle, #Entertainment

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert: Welcome to the monthly meeting of "The Society for the Preservation of Evil Ideas." Our goal for the coming year is to convince companies to file absurdly broad patents and sue each other for infringing. CIO: How do we make money from that? Dogbert: Beats me. I'm just here to embezzle your dues.