Quality Of Decions Comic Strips - Page 5
143 Results for Quality Of Decions
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Share October 11, 2007's comic on:
The Boss: I hired an unqualified crony to run our quality control group. "I value loyalty over competence. That's the sign of a great leader." Dilbert: "Do you see any problem with that?" The Boss: "It makes you look extra disloyal?"
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Share April 27, 2007's comic on:
"This blog post you wrote for me isn't witty enough." "Try it again, but make me sound like Mark Twain." "'I reckon you'd be hankerin' for some quality. 'Taint happenin' but it orter.'"
Share January 07, 2007's comic on:
The Boss: Tina, I need you to edit this before I send it out. Sure. I could use a good laugh. Let's start with the words that aren't words." Incentiment...robustify...flexitate...and leadershipping." "I'll take those out and see what's left." "'If you're not onboard with quality excellence, you're underboard.'" "WA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA!!!" "Why do I even bother trying to moralify these people."
Share January 05, 2007's comic on:
My diet is making me too hungry to listen. I hope that doesn't affect the quality of my decisions. "Amortize the depreciation over the bandwidth of the discount rate." "Don't ask him for anything today." "I brought an emergency hoagie."
Share March 27, 2006's comic on:
"Here's our prototype from the Elbonian factory." "Well, I'm no expert, but this is obviously a good one of these." "It's an mp3 player." "We used to call them plumber's helpers!"
Share September 16, 2005's comic on:
I need you to pick up Ted's function. "No problem. I have infinite capacity to do more work as long as you don't mind that my quality approaches zero." "Or are you asking me to do something that's logically impossible?" "I think I hate you."
Share September 04, 2005's comic on:
"The trouble started when you insisted on giving inspirational names to the conference rooms." "I scheduled a project meeting for the 'Quality' room and no one knew where to go." "Some people ended up in the 'Teamwork' room while others went to the 'Excellence' room." "By the time we sorted it all out, someone else was scheduled to use our conference room." "Then it took three weeks to schedule another meeting when everyone could make it." "But half of the team went to the 'Action' room and sat there while we waited for them in the 'Good Planning' room." "I thought this was the budget meeting."
Share July 26, 2005's comic on:
The boss: "Alice, where are the quality estimates that I asked you for an hour ago?" "It's between your left arm and your stout torso, about elbow-high." "Stupid elbow."
Share January 20, 2005's comic on:
Tina trains her boss Tina: You'll find me in this chair. doing real work. Tina: your job, as I understand it, is to make uninformed decisions and act like a sociopathic egomaniac, Tina: you'll usually stand like this. I also like to fidget and harrumph.