Remove Comic Strips - Page 5

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52 Results for Remove

View 41 - 50 results for remove comic strips. Discover the best "Remove" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 16, 1995's comic on:


Tags #ban all meetings, #dress code, #casual staus, #mission statements, #have fun, #satisfy customers, #make money, #fit five more, #cucbicle, #chair, #stock options

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Dogbert stands on a podium addressing a crowd of office workers, including Dilbert, Wally and Alice. Dogbert says, "As new owner of this company I hereby ban all meetings over one hour. The dress code is casual. Status reports are optional!" Dogbert continues, "No more mission statements or 'visions.' Our motto is 'have fun, satisfy customers, make money.'" Dilbert sleeps in his chair. In Dilbert's dream, Dogbert concludes his speech to the employees, "And stock options for all." Outside Dilbert's cubicle, Dogbert says to the Boss, "We can fit five more in this cubicle if we remove the chair."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 16, 1994's comic on:


Tags #makeup, #real bother, #a lot of work, #admit, #remove old makeup, #bowling alley

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Woman: Ive never minded putting makeup on, but its a real bother to take it off. Dilbert: That seems like a lot of work, I must admit. But I still think its better to remove the old stiff. Woman: Its only a problem at the bowling alley.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 13, 1994's comic on:


Tags #body language, #politely tell, #remove watch, #smash watch, #daily planner, #feel good, #act bored, #self heimlich manuever, #kerokian dodge, #instructions

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"Dogbert's Body Language Update" "Are you hampered by the limits of conventional body language?" "I can help." - How can you politely tell somebody he's babbling? "Babble, Babble." - Remove the offender's watch while he babbles.- "Babble." - Smash the watch with your daily planner. - "Babble." "Whack!" - This won't stop the babble, but it will feel real good for a minute.- "Babble." "Mmm." - Use this position to signal your surrender to the babble.- "Babble." -Next week - the self-Heimlich manuever and the Kervorkian dodge.- "Babble."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 24, 1993's comic on:


Tags #ted, #carol, #message, #manager, #secretary, #copies, #sting, #desire

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Ted: May I slip in? I only need one copy. Carol: What's the message here? Is your time worth more than my time because you're a manager and I'm a secretary? Huh? This might sting for a second, but it'll remove your desire to make copies.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 18, 1993's comic on:


Tags #Dogbert, #man, #zombies, #coffee, #office

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Dogbert stands on top of a beverage container and says, "To be a zombie you must drink the zombie elixir." Dogbert continues, "The zombie elixir will remove any distracting thoughts of sleep or family life." A man looks in his mug and says, "It looks like coffee." Dogbert holds a giant spoon of sugar and says, "You have to add one scoop of zombie sugar."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 04, 1991's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #pencil, #electric, #sharpener, #excalibert, #whoever, #remove, #ceo, #co-worker

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Dilbert says to a man, "Somebody left a pencil in the electric sharpener." The man replies, "That's 'Excalibert.'" The man continues, "Legend has it that whoever can remove Excalibert from the sharpener will become CEO." Dilbert removes the pencil and asks, "Like this?" A beam of light shines down on the pencil.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 06, 1991's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #read, #sculpt, #elephant, #start, #chunk, #marble, #remove, #everything

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Dilbert holds a chisel and other carving tools. A block of marble sits on a stand under a picture of an elephant. Dilbert says to Dogbert who sits on a stool watching, "I've read that it's easy to sculpt an elephant . . ." Dilbert continues, "You just start with a chunk of marble and remove everything that doesn't look like an elephant." Later, Dilbert stares at the chips of marble that remain on the stand. Dilbert thinks, "Apparently, this chunk of marble didn't have an elephant in it."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 09, 1991's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #temperature, #internal, #organs, #compared, #bout, #bubonic, #plague, #repaired, #mower, #co-worker

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Dilbert and three men sit at a table eating lunch. A man says, "Yeah . . . I had a temperature of 147 degrees and they had to remove my internal organs." Another man says, "Well, that's nothing compared to my bout with bubonic plague last week." A man with no head asks, "Did I ever tell you about the time I repaired my own lawn mower?" Another man thinks, "Not again."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 29, 1990's comic on:


Tags #frog, #Dogs, #Dogbert, #kiss, #princess, #props, #fool, #lady di, #margaritas, #Dilbert, #love, #witch

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The caption says, "Dilbert needs a kiss from a princess to remove the frog curse." Dilbert the Frog says to Dogbert, "It's hopeless . . ." Dogbert opens the closet door and says, "There's one chance, but we'll need some props." Dilbert is wearing a crown and a fake nose. Dilbert asks, "You seriously think this will fool Lady Di?" Dogbert replies, "I'd wait until she's had a few margaritas."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 28, 1990's comic on:


Tags #Dogbert, #buckingham palace, #princess, #kiss, #frog, #witch's, #curse, #lady di, #hideous, #creatures, #awkward, #Family, #reunions

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Dogbert stands on a chair and Dogbert the Frog sits next to him. Dogbert says into the telephone, "Hello . . . Buckingham Palace? I was wondering if the Princess would be willing to kiss a frog and remove a witch's curse for us." Dogbert says into the phone, "Oh . . . Lady Di does not kiss hideous little creatures . . ." Dogbert says, "That must be mighty awkward at family reunions . . . Hello?" Dilbert covers his eyes.