Share Button Comic Strips - Page 5

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

108 Results for Share Button

View 41 - 50 results for share button comic strips. Discover the best "Share Button" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #5 minute huddle, #high energy, #standup meeting, #solved in minute

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss: I want the entire staff to meet at 10 A.M. every day for a five-minute huddle. The Boss: We'll use this high-energy stand-up meeting to solve problems and share successes. The Boss: Who has a problem that can be solved in a minute?"Wally: I'm tired. Can I sit on you?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #brilliant ideas, #carnage, #honesty, #ignorance, #ludicrous ideas, #mean spirited, #mistaken self image, #roll eyes, #share project, #verbally demolish

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice, I'm hoping we can work together on this project in the spirit of cooperation. I'll have some ideas, and you'll have some ideas, and together we can pick the best ones. Alice: Sure, that's one approach. But I prefer to exhale deeply and roll my eyes while you prattle. Then I will verbally demolish your ludicrous ideas, and dismantle your mistaken self-image as a competent man. The carnage will create a striking contrast for the warm, clear glow of my brilliant ideas. Later, I will round out the package by spreading amusing stories about how ignorant you are. Is there any chance of doing it my way? Alice: Now watch the eyes."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #prototype, #perfectly safe, #grim reaper, #works for free

View Transcript

Transcript

The boss: "Don't worry, Asok. The prototype is perfectly safe." The boss: "I found you a co-pilot. He's a bit grim, but he works for free." Copilot: "Hey, I wonder what this button does."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #strategic asset, #market share, #fire yourself, #accountabilty

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss: Human resources is a company's most important strategic asset. "That means it's your fault we're losing market share. Maybe you should fire yourself." "Strategic assets don't like accountability."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #software, #budget, #computer, #tiny mittens, #thermometer, #hell, #your turn, #nice guy, #intern, #abused, #mean coworkers, #technology, #engineering

View Transcript

Transcript

Asok: I need this software to do my job. The Boss: "The software budget is spent. Just share a computer with someone who has this software." Alice: "Why don't you take your tiny mittens and a thermometer to hell and wait for a sign that it's your turn."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #user interface, #add button, #random changes, #create illusion, #adding value

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss: Why did you add this button to the user interface? Dilbert: You told me to. The boss: Why would I tell you that? Dilbert: You always suggest random changes to create the illusion of adding value. The Boss: Well, remove that button. Dilbert: It's only on your copy."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #quagmire, #alien, #highly advanced intelligence, #genius

View Transcript

Transcript

Alien: I am an alien with highly advanced intelligence. I have come to share my genius with this company. Asok: Me too. But they don't like that sort of thing here. It's a quagmire."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #employee appreciation day

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss: We're going to have an employee appreciation day on the 8th! "That's a Sunday." Alice: That's the best day for a potluck lunch. The Boss: You'll have all day Saturday to make a dish to share!" "I'll need a volunteer to organize everything. Let's see...Which one of you is the woman?" "Bring jackets. It's supposed to be about 45 degrees in the park that day." "I won't be able to attend because I do personal stuff on weekends." "Take pictures!" I hope no one else brought a pine cone appetizer."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #share cubicle, #date you, #incredible time together, #if it didn't work

View Transcript

Transcript

"It's too bad that we share a cubicle. Otherwise I'd date you." "If it didn't work out, we'd have to see each other every day." "...Always reminded of our incredible time together." "Where's the bad?!! Where's the bad?!!"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #share cubicle, #outrageous, #fight, #board of directors, #importance of teamwork

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss: "Dilbert, we're low on space. You'll have to share your cubicle." Dilbert: "This is outrageous! I will fight this all the way to the board of directors!" share cubicle,"Hola. My name is Lola." "But then I remembered the importance of teamwork."