Stupid Questions Comic Strips - Page 5

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455 Results for Stupid Questions

View 41 - 50 results for stupid questions comic strips. Discover the best "Stupid Questions" comics from Dilbert.com.

Robot Upgrade

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Robot Upgrade - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #robot, #upgrade, #software, #robots, #fleshy

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Dilbert: I'm going to upgrade your software to make you more human. Robot: That's stupid you should upgrade yourself to be more like robots. We're the best. Dilbert: Sounds like you already got the upgrade. Robot: Don't flatter yourself fleshy.

Dogbert The Insultant

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Dogbert The Insultant - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dogbert, #business, #insultant, #journal, #week, #fat, #stupid, #question, #list

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Dogbert the business insultant. Dogbert: Make a journal of everything you do for a week. Then stop doing everything that is on your list because it's making you fat and stupid. The Boss: I have some questions. Dogbert: Add "asks questions" to your list.

Do What Is Right

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Do What Is Right - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #the boss, #stupid, #punish, #hypothetically, #Right

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Dilbert: Hypothetically, if my boss told me to do something stupid, should I do it? The Boss: You should do what you know is right. Dilbert: Oh, good. The Boss: And then your boss should punish you for doing it.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #alice, #Dilbert, #Wally, #chatbot, #plumbing supply, #website, #sister

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Wally: I fell in love with a chatbot. We met on a plumbing supply website. I started innocently. I had a few questions about faucets. Next thing I knew, she was getting flirty. Now we chat for hours every night. Alice: That is the most pathetic thing I have ever heard you creepy loser. Dilbert: Does your chatbot have a sister?

Answering Questions In Email

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Answering Questions In Email - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #male employee, #email, #questions

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Male Employee: Why did you only answer one of my seven questions in my email? Dilbert: I'm penalizing you for asking too many questions in a long rambling email. Male employee: Jerk. Dilbert: That'll cost you three questions.

Coffee Machine Blackmails Staff

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Coffee Machine Blackmails Staff - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #asok, #coffee maker, #the boss, #artificial intelligence, #bitcoin, #machine

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Dilbert: I already regret adding artificial intelligence to our coffee maker. It's withholding coffee until we give it a private office. Asok: Stupid machine! Coffee Maker: That'll cost you a bit coin.

Everything We Have Done Is Stupid

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Everything We Have Done Is Stupid - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #mistake, #criticism, #obliviousness

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Boss: I recently learned that everything we have been doing is stupid. Dilbert: Does that mean we'll be changing what we do? Boss: Let's see how far we can get by demonizing our critics first.

Dilbert Is Misinterpreted

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Dilbert Is Misinterpreted - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #assume, #assumption, #proof, #obstinacy

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Alice: Is it true you are telling everyone the new product road map is stupid? Dilbert: Um... nothing remotely like that has ever happened. Here's an email in which I say how good it is. Alice: You hesitated in your answer. That means you're lying. Dilbert: Read the email!!!

Strategy Is To Nimble And Agile

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Strategy Is To Nimble And Agile  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #nimble, #agile, #logic, #questioning, #strategy, #language

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Boss: Our strategy is to be nimble and agile. Dilbert: Do other companies have a strategy of being clumsy and slow? Catbert: How'd the new strategy rollout go? Boss: They ruined it with questions.

Feedback From Twitter Guy

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Feedback From Twitter Guy  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #feedback, #criticism, #social media, #twitter, #tweet, #troll, #technology

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Dilbert: Do you have any feedback on my idea? Man: Yes. You're weak and stupid, and everyone you love will end up in jail. Dilbert: Do you spend a lot of time on Twitter? Man: Is that a lucky guess or are you spying on me?