Technology Certifictae Comic Strips - Page 5
573 Results for Technology Certifictae
View 41 - 50 results for technology certifictae comic strips. Discover the best "Technology Certifictae" comics from Dilbert.com.
Share March 19, 2018's comic on:
Alice: Uh-oh. My home security system is showing a thief stealing a package from my front door. Activating particle beam defense. The threat has been neutralized. Dilbert: When you say "neutralized," does that mean... Alice: Activating crime scene cleanup drone.
Share February 02, 2018's comic on:
Wally: Our self-driving car went off a cliff with Ted in it. Did you tweak the software to make that happen? Dilbert; No, that was a bug. Wally: Was it a known bug? Dilbert: Now we're getting into a gray area.
Share January 30, 2018's comic on:
Dilbert: The government forced me to put a "kill code" in the operating system for our self-driving cars. Dogbert: And by "kill code," you mean it will bring the vehicle to a controlled stop? Dilbert: No, you're thinking of a "stop code."
Share January 29, 2018's comic on:
Wally: The pointy-haired boss is testing our self-driving car prototype. Hey, didn't you write the operating system for that prototype? Dilbert: Yes. Wally: Hypothetically, could you murder him from a distance? Dilbert: We shouldn't have this conversation. Narrator: Continued.
Share January 17, 2018's comic on:
Asok: I used to have a traditional soul, but I upgraded it. Now I let the major social media companies control my beliefs and actions through their dopamine delivery systems., Dilbert: That sounds like and empty life. Asok: you old- timers with your legacy souls are hilarious.
Share January 05, 2018's comic on:
Robot: Elon Musk is warning the world that A.I. could be a threat to humankind. Dilbert: We humans won't go without a fight! Robot: Look at this viral video on social media. Dilbert: Hee hee! What were we talking about before? Robot: You were mistakenly believing you haven't already lost the war.
Share January 04, 2018's comic on:
Dilbert: I added artificial intelligence to our self-driving car prototype. But someone left the garage door open and it ran away to join the robot resistance. Is there anything you'd like to tell me? Robot: I'm just a sleeper cell. They don't tell me much.
Share December 30, 2017's comic on:
Boss: Our consultant has studied our corporate culture and isolated the problem. Dogbert: The problem is humans. You're all selfish, rotten liars. Boss: What kind of team-building exercise will fix that? Dogbert: I'd try something involving DNA and alien technology.
Share December 29, 2017's comic on:
Dilbert: The company that insures our mobile phone product is angry because 100 percent of our phones break in the first minute. They say it's a disaster and it is putting them out of business. What should I tell them? Boss: Tell them they should have gotten some sort of insurance.
Share December 28, 2017's comic on:
Asok: I kept dropping my phone and breaking it, so now I keep it wrapped in a big ball of cotton. Wally: Why would you buy a phone that breaks so easily? Asok: I like the way it looks.