Unimportant Project Comic Strips - Page 5
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704 Results for Unimportant Project
View 41 - 50 results for unimportant project comic strips. Discover the best "Unimportant Project" comics from Dilbert.com.
Thursday November 07,
2019
Learning What Doesn't Work
Tags managers & supervisors, project, fail, failure, business
Transcript
wally in meeting: my project failed miserably, but i think we can agree we came out ahead. for example, we learned what does not work boss: you? wally: that's one way to look at it.
Wednesday November 06,
2019
Imperfect Decisions
Tags business, managers & supervisors, project, vacation, decision, uninformed, perfect, good, stupid, smart, enemy
Transcript
boss: while you were on vacation, we made some decisions about your project. dilbert: those would be uninformed decisions if you made them without me. boss: don't let perfect be the enemy of good dilbert: can i let stupid be the enemy of smart?
Saturday October 26,
2019
Self Reliant
Tags managers & supervisors, business, project, teamwork, help, teach, self-reliant
Transcript
boss to wally: ted says you wouldn't help him on his project. wally: i was teaching him how to be self-reliant. that's important too, isn't it? not such an easy question, is it?
Thursday October 24,
2019
Project Update
Sunday September 15,
2019
Wally Wears Headphones
Tags employees, irritation, office workers, avoidance, hear, headphones
Transcript
Alice: Do you have a minute? Wally: I can't hear you because I'm wearing noise-cancelling headphones. Alice: Maybe you could take them off for a minute. Wally: I have no idea what you are saying because I'm wearing noise-cancelling headphones. Alice: Then take them off! Wally: If I am reading your lips correctly, I believe you are asking me to "flurp tingo gloop". Alice: Forget it! I'll just let my project fail! Dilbert: How is your anti-co-worker defense system working out? Wally: I can't hear you.
Saturday September 14,
2019
Ignorant Opinions
Tags boss, criticism, insults, office workers, Opinion, sarcasm
Transcript
Man: I told your boss I think your project is heading in the wrong direction. Dilbert: Given that you only know about 20% of what one should know to have an informed opinion on the topic, may I conclude that you are stupid and toxic? Man: You don't know me! Dilbert: I'm basing my opinion on the 20% I do know.
Monday September 09,
2019
Scourge Of Teamwork
Tags help, insults, office workers, work, teams
Transcript
Man: Do you need any help on your project? Dilbert: No, I try to avoid the scourge of teamwork when-ever possible. Man: Isn't there any way I can be of service? Dilbert: Maybe you could offer to help someone I hate.
Thursday August 08,
2019
Poor Communication Skills
Tags communication, employees, office, office workers, questions, projects
Transcript
Man: Would you like to be on my project team? Dilbert: Hard pass. Your communication skills are so poor that the project is doomed to failure. Man: I meant to say your boss already assigned you to my project. Dilbert: We're off to a good start.
Monday July 29,
2019
Can't Succeed Within The Rules
Tags business, failure, managers & supervisors, rules, success
Transcript
dilbert: if i follow all of our internal rules, my project will fail because of delays. and if i don't follow the rules, you will fire me. what should i do? boss: i like the option where the project is a success but you're a failure.