1990 Comic Strips - Page 5

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dilbert, Dogbert, light, reaching, earth, comfortable, misconception, miracle, science

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Dilbert and Dogbert sit on a stone wall looking at the stars. Dogbert says, "No matter how bad the day is, the stars are always there." Dilbert says, "Actually, many of them burned out years ago, but their light is just now reaching earth." Dogbert says, "Thank you for shattering my comfortable misconception." Dilbert says, "It's the miracle of science."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags dilbert's ego, Dogbert, pound, pudding, faint, fable, children's, story, insecurities

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Dilbert's Ego vs. His Insecurities Dilbert's Ego: C'mon, you coward. You may be big, but I'm going to pound you into pudding!! Dilbert's Insecurities: I'm going to faint. Dogbert: I don't think this will be a children's fable anytime soon.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dilbert, Dogbert, force, ego, insecurities

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Dilbert confronts his own ego. Dilbert: You can't leave me now... Dilbert's ego: Nobody tells me what to do! I am pure ego force! Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!! Dilbert: Maybe you'd like to discuss that with my insecurities.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dogbert, Dilbert, armchair, foot, time, reach, outlet, cord, hose, grandfather, invented, clean

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Dogbert struggles with a vacuum cleaner. He thinks, "What idiot invented the canister vacuum cleaner?" Dogbert thinks, "I can only do about a foot at a time . . ." Dogbert pushes the vacuum cleaner and thinks, "Then I have to push this thing another foot." Dogbert turns to the reader and says, "Notice the tiny wheels which are designed to roll on any surface except carpet." Dogbert holds the electrical plug and thinks, "Now I can't reach the outlet." Dogbert thinks, "Then I get hopelessly tangled in the cord and hose." Dilbert enters the room and says, "Hi, Dogbert. Did I ever tell you that my grandfater invented the canister vacuum cleaner?" Dogbert says, "Come closer." Dogbert uses the vacuum cleaner to suck Dilbert's clothes off his body. Dilbert is left wearing only his underwear. Dilbert says, "That's probably why I never mentioned it."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags dilbert's ego, Dogbert, numbers, phone, female cops, police officers, 911

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Dogbert: Uh-oh! Dilbert's escaped ego has grown since getting that toupee. Dilbert's Ego: Ho-ho, what a night! I crashed a party for female police officers! I got phone numbers from twelve women! Dogbert: 9-1-1? Dilbert's Ego: They must be roommates.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags dilbert's, ego, porsche, woman, Dilbert, dating, bar

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Dogbert: Nice toupee. Dilbert's Ego: Thanks. It's the, "Roy Orbison," model. I am now ready to hit the dating scene. Woman at Bar: Really? You drive a porsche? Dilbert's Ego: It's red... But enough about me.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags dilbert's ego, sunglasses, personality, toupee, roy orbison, rely, employee, store, update, image

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Dilbert's Ego: I'm Dilbert's ego. I'd like to update image with a toupee. Male Employee: I recommend the, "Roy Orbison," Model. It comes with sunglasses. Dilbert's Ego: Now I won't have to rely so heavily on my personality,

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dogbert, dilbert's ego, bald, broccoli, toupee

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The caption says, "Dogbert meets Dilbert's ego." Dogbert asks, "You want a toupee?" Dilbert's ego replies, "I feel okay about myself except for being bald." Dogbert says, "I hate to tell you, but with or without hair you still look like broccoli." The ego replies, "At least I won't be bald broccoli."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dilbert, Dogbert, dilbert's ego, feeding, toupee, store, disowned

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Dogbert: I know you; you're filbert's ego. Dilbert's Ego: Correct. I disowned him. Me just wasn't feeding me enough. Dogbert: What can a little ego do to feed itself. Dilbert: Which way to the toupee store.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dogbert, cushion, pillow, eat, pace, laziness

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Dogbert sits on his pillow thinking, "I have a busy day ahead of me." Dogbert thinks, "Got to do some pillow-sitting, maybe eat a little." Dogbert thinks, "I'd better pace myself."