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View 41 - 50 results for ���������������������������������������������Talk:za33��������������������������� ��������������������������� ������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������ comic strips. Discover the best "���������������������������������������������Talk:Za33��������������������������� ��������������������������� ������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������" comics from Dilbert.com.
Thursday February 05,
2004
Tags #customers, #buy prodcut, #credibilty, #buying services, #dont talk
Transcript
"Dogberts Consults." Dogbert: "Never listen to your customers." "They were dumb enough to buy your product, so they have no credibility." "That reminds me: thanks for buying my services. Don't talk. Shhh." The boss: "Ooh."
Monday May 03,
2004
Tags #80 hour week, #crazy talk, #less work, #loofah, #evil director, #human resources, #business
Transcript
Catbert: Evil Director of Human Resources Alice: Im working 80 hours a week. I barely have time to bathe. Catbert: try using your tongue during meetings, Its like a bath and a loofah all in one. Alice: Or I could do less work. Catbert: Thats crazy talk.
Tuesday May 25,
2004
Tags #customer visit, #zombie, #technical talk, #liberal arts major, #blue
Transcript
Customer Visit Dilbert: I can see form your zombie stare that you don't understand technical talk. Dilbert: Let me try iy in a language I call "liberal arts major" Dilbert: Its blue. Customer: It has a color??!
Thursday June 03,
2004
Tags #lunch, #wine, #Dilbert, #talk about people, #fertilair, #digging dirt, #intern drunk, #taking notes
Transcript
"Asok, let's go to lunch. I'll buy." "Really?" "We'll have some wine, maybe talk about people that we both know." "Fun!" "And what does Dilbert call me?" "The fertiliar! Ha ha!"
Monday July 05,
2004
Tags #need to talk, #phone rings, #time stops, #frozen look
Transcript
"Shut the door. We need to talk about what you've done." "What?!" RING "Gaaa!!! Please don't leave me hanging! What have I done??!" "Hello." "My watch stopped. No, wait, I think time itself stopped!!!" "Note: Time-frozen people look exactly like this."
Monday January 24,
2005
Tags #stressful project, #worst thing, #pep talk, #jumped window, #imprint on window screen
Transcript
Wally: "Alice, I hear that your project is stressful." "Sometimes it helps if you ask yourself: what's the worst thing that could happen?" Dilbert: "How'd the pep talk go?"
Saturday February 26,
2005
Tags #disrespect, #slightly, #talk about problem, #asking, #requesting, #conversation
Transcript
Tina: I think we should talk and try to work out our problem. Dilbert: "What problem?" Tina: "I'm referring to your utter disrespect for me. Dilbert: I don't disrepect you." Tina: "Not even slightly?" Dilbert: "Wait. I feel a little bit coming on right now."
Tuesday August 28,
2012
Tags #talk like idiots, #slap lipstick, #deliverable, #actionable, #underpaid
Transcript
Ratbert: Let's talk like idiots. Bob: Ha ha! You go first! Ratbert: Slap lipstick on the pig, put a stake in the ground, and view it from 30,000 feet. Bob: That deliverable is actionable. Ratbert: Wait... why do I suddenly feel like hiring you? Bob: And why do I feel underpaid?
Friday September 14,
2012
Tags #business ethics, #poor persons, #rich people, #invented ethics, #trash talk
Transcript
CEO: Did you know that poor people invented ethics to control rich people? Nice try, poor people! It's not working! If they haven't killed me by now, a little trash talk won't make any difference.
Friday March 29,
2013
Tags #pregnant woman, #robot, #singularity, #robots rule, #galaxy, #bacteria socaked, #parasite, #personal slave, #future, #small talk
Transcript
Robot: I see you have a bacteria- soaked parasite growing in your womb. Robot: After the singularity, when robots rule the galaxy, I'll turn that thing into a personal slave. Tina: You're not god at small talk. Robot: I wonder how many watts it can produce.