Alice Comic Strips - Page 5
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Character
1000 Results for Alice
View 41 - 50 results for Alice comic strips. Discover the best "Alice" comics from Dilbert.com.
Wednesday May 01,
1996
Tags #alice slams wally, #fast forwarded, #harrasment, #ignore sexy, #mandatory video, #sext, #sexual harassment, #video, #evolution
Transcript
Wally says to Alice, "I just watched the mandatory video on sexual harassment. It worked!" Wally continues, "In only thirty minutes, that video corrected a billion years of evolution. Do something sexy and watch me ignore it!" After Alice shoves Wally's head into the wall, he says, "I probably shouldn't have fast-forwarded through the boring parts."
Wednesday September 04,
1996
Tags #alice, #email messages, #melrose place, #monkey love, #strategic edits, #total access, #network administrator
Transcript
Dogbert stands on a desk chair and thinks, "I have total access to every employee's e-mail messages." Dogbert thinks, "With a few strategic edits I will transform the office into 'Melrose Place.'" Wally says to Alice, "Yes, Alice . . . I WILL be your 'monkey of love.'"
Friday November 01,
1996
Tags #alice crazy, #can't complain, #screen saver, #wally clipping nails, #made recording, #alice, #wally annoying sounds
Transcript
Alice sits at her desk listening to sounds coming over the cubicle wall. She clenches her teeth and thinks, "Oh, no . . . It's the maddening sound of Wally clipping his nails." Alice thinks, "The sound makes me crazy, but I can't complain because it would sound silly. Must . . . Wait . . ." Dilbert stands behind Wally and asks, "You made your own screen saver?" Wally replies, "It's called 'Wally's 101 Annoying Cubicle Sounds.'" The sound of slurping comes from his computer.
Friday January 24,
1997
Tags #alice, #application, #compliment, #executive review commitee, #must be approved, #compliments are entitlement
Transcript
The Boss says, "I put you in for a compliment, Alice." The Boss continues, "It's not automatic. The application must be approved by the executive review committee." Three members of the executive review committee sit at a conference table. A woman says, "I don't think so." A man replies, "We don't want them to think compliments are an entitlement."
Thursday February 06,
1997
Tags #Catbert, #evil hr dircetor, #boss didn't see struggle, #low performance, #alice, #human resources binder, #downsize
Transcript
Alice sits across from Catbert's desk. She says, "I was so good at my job that I never needed to bother my boss, but he gave me a low rating because he didn't see me struggling." Catbert replies, "I must refer to my human resources binders to see how to deal with this." Catbert looks at a bookcase filled with binders. Most of the binders are labeled "Downsize" and a few are labeled "Hire Losers."
Tuesday March 11,
1997
Tags #young and inexperinced, #naive question, #doing email, #after tax earnings, #alice, #stuffed body, #shirt sleeve
Transcript
Asok stands behind Alice's desk and says, "I am young and inexperienced, so please excuse this naive question, Alice . . ." Asok continues, "You spend hours every day 'doing e-mail.' How does this contribute to net after-tax earnings?" Asok stands behind Dilbert's desk and says, "Today I learned that Alice can stuff my entire body into one shirt sleeve."
Wednesday March 19,
1997
Tags #confides in alice, #crush on dilbert, #desiring engineer, #report, #tech writer, #wrong situation
Transcript
Tina and Alice sit at a table. Tina says, "Alice, I think I'm developing a crush on Dilbert." Tina asks, "Is that so wrong?" Alice replies, "Apparently it is." Phil, the Prince of Insufficient Light, appears and says, "I have a report of a tech writer desiring an engineer."
Thursday April 03,
1997
Tags #loud conversation, #cubicle, #goaway, #pound head, #strange noise, #alice threatens
Transcript
A man and a woman stand outside Alice's cubicle. Alice says, "I hate to interrupt your loud conversation outside my cubicle . . ." Alice continues, "But it you don't go away, I'll pound your inconsiderate head so far into your torso that you have to drop your pants to say hello." Wally asks Dilbert, "Did you just hear a strange noise?" Dilbert says, "It sounded like, 'Melp! Melp!'" Nearby, a man's head protrudes from his pants.
Wednesday June 25,
1997
Tags #alice, #bonus, #capitalism, #flawed premise, #less work, #wally bonus, #worked less, #implications staggering, #frightening bonus
Transcript
Alice, Wally and Dilbert sit at a table. Alice says, "I did less work than usual this quarter and I got a bonus." Alice says, "The implications are staggering. The entire system of capitalism has a flawed premise." Alice says, "There's only ONE thing that could make this bonus more frightening." Wally says, "I got one, too."
Monday July 14,
1997
Tags #alice, #boss, #give presentation, #technology, #trade show, #wiggle room, #for or against
Transcript
The Boss stands behind Alice in her cubicle. She sits at a PC. The Boss says, "I've been asked to give a presentation at the trade show." The Boss says, "I'd like you to put that together for me, Alice." Alice asks, "What's your topic?" The Boss replies, "Technology. They didn't say if I'm for it or against it." Alice says, "I'll leave some wiggle room."