Art Of Full Body Lying Comic Strips - Page 5

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

591 Results for Art Of Full Body Lying

View 41 - 50 results for art of full body lying comic strips. Discover the best "Art Of Full Body Lying" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #park bench, #Dogbert, #parties, #lift, #heavy, #sound, #dumb, #body, #builder, #pay

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert sits on a park bench next to a muscular man. The large man says, "It's not easy to be a professional body builder." The man continues, "At parties, people ask what I do. I have to say 'I lift heavy things, then I put them down.' It makes me sound dumb." Dogbert asks, "How's the pay?" The man asks, "Pay?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #senate, #judiciary, #committee, #questioning, #interpret, #roe versus wade, #lying, #deny, #accusing

View Transcript

Transcript

A senator at a table says into a microphone, "Mister Dogbert, the Senate Judiciary Committee will begin the questioning." The senator asks, "How would you interpret Roe versus Wade?" Dogbert replies, "They're lying. I deny everything." The senator says, "We're not accusing you . . ." Dogbert says, "Hey, I didn't bring it up!"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #retrospect, #tested, #scalp, #body, #works, #invention, #hair growth, #formula, #engineer

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert and Dogbert sit at the table. Dilbert's body is covered with hair. Dilbert says, "The good news is that my hair growth formula works." Dilbert continues, "In retrospect, I should have tested it on my scalp instead of all over my body." Dogbert says, "Hindsight . . ." Dilbert says, "Yeah . . ."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #company, #person, #brains, #department, #body, #engineering, #snot

View Transcript

Transcript

A man says to Dilbert, "Think of the company as a person. We in marketing would be the 'brains.'" The man continues, "The sales department would be the 'body.'" Dilbert asks, "What's engineering?" The man replies, "The snot."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #ratbert, #Dogbert, #lenin, #body, #museum, #communism

View Transcript

Transcript

Ratbert: Wow! You bought Lenin's body? Dogbert: Only ten dollars. Now I have to decide what to do with it. Ratbert: You could build a museum. Dogbert: I was thinking of using him as a coffee table.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #approve, #buying, #lenin, #body, #desk, #listening, #nostrils, #pencil, #holder

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert says to Dogbert, "I didn't approve of you buying Lenin's body to begin with . . ." The body lies across milk crates. Dilbert continues, "And I certainly don't approve of you making a desk out of it." Dilbert asks, "Are you listening to me?" Dogbert says, "Hey, if I flip him over I can use his nostrils as a pencil holder!"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #Wally, #answer, #work, #body, #language, #discourage, #working, #ted

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert, Wally and Ted sit at a conference table. Dilbert says, "Maybe Ted can answer that question . . ." Ted thinks, "Uh-oh." Ted thinks, "They're trying to make me work. I'll have to use body language to discourage them." Ted puts a pencil up his nose and rubs his head. Dilbert says, "Uh . . . Never mind." Ted thinks, "It's working."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #survive, #plane, #crash, #worcestershire sauce, #whack, #cannabal, #meat, #tenderizer, #wonder, #body

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert, Dogbert, a captain and several people stand on a snow-covered mountain. Off in the distance is a crashed airplane. A man in a pilot's uniform says, "I've survived several jet crashes this year, so listen to me." The man continues, "The best way to prevent frostbite is to rub Worcestershire sauce on your body and whack yourself repeatedly with a meat tenderizer." As people pour sauce on themselves Dilbert thinks, "I wonder why he had enough of these for everybody?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dogbert, #ratbert, #channeling, #hostility, #art, #bowl, #fruit, #banana, #hates, #apple

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert sits at the table and Ratbert stands on the table holding a paintbrush and palette. Ratbert looks at his easel and says, "I'm channeling all of my pain and hostility into my art." Dogbert says, "All I see is a bowl of fruit." Ratbert makes angry brushstrokes and replies, "The banana HATES the apple."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #multimedia, #include, #video, #music, #computer, #programs, #morning, #face, #theme, #star wars, #budget, #spreadsheet, #forgot, #survived, #ugly, #science, #collide, #art

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert stands at a desk in front of a computer and video camera. Dilbert says, "It's called multimedia, Dogbert. Now I can include video and music with my computer programs." Dilbert continues, "This morning I added my face plus the theme song from 'Star Wars' to my budget spreadsheet." Dilbert continues, "I already forgot how I survived without it." Dogbert replies, "It can get pretty ugly when science and art collide."