Ate Up Time Comic Strips - Page 5
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Share May 07, 1994's comic on:
Alice: I'm going to seek relief from my many woes by sharing them with you. My entire family is in a coma....The cat ate my wedding ring,,,,The IRS is auditing us....my boss made a pass at me. It isn't working, you aren't absorbing my woes. Dilbert: Im wearing into woe cologne.
Share May 14, 1994's comic on:
Ratbert: Here's my final consulting report on your company. Ive listed all the deadweight employees who should be fired. The Boss: This is the company directory. Ratbert: Finding that was a huge time saver.
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Share August 05, 1994's comic on:
Dilbert: Here's the final design for Project 'Zebra'. I worked day and night for weeks to finish it on time. The Boss: I canceled that project a month ago, I meat to tell you. Dilbert: In some countries it would be legal to kill you with this binder, The Boss: Thats why I don't travel.
Share October 17, 1994's comic on:
The Boss: I put together a time line for your project. I started by reasoning that anything I don't understand is easy to do. Phase one: design a client-server architecture for our world wide operations time: six minutes.
Share December 31, 1994's comic on:
The Boss says to Dilbert, Wally and Alice, "I'm going to make your group a 'self-managed team.'" The Boss continues, "All of the vital management tasks that I've been doing will now be shared among you." Dilbert says to Wally and Alice, "Stop your work and give me a status report." Alice says, "Track your time." Wally says, "I think I'll kiss some butts."
Share January 07, 1995's comic on:
Dilbert is seated at his desk and Ratbert stands on the desk beside him. Dilbert shows Ratbert something in his palm and says, "Look Ratbert. An entire computer has been baked into one silicon chip." Ratbert grabs the chip and eats it, saying, "Thanks! I don't mind if I do!" Dilbert says angrily, "You ate my computer!" Ratbert holds his arms out straight, stares ahead and replies, "I'm a cyborg."
Share February 04, 1995's comic on:
The Boss stands in front of Dilbert who is seated at his desk. The Boss hands Dilbert a document and says, "I ranked all of your assignments by priority so you won't waste time on unimportant stuff." Dilbert reads the document and says, "Everything is an 'A' priority except for 'Personal life.'" Dilbert says, "this helps a lot." The Boss says, "I'm still working on the list of 'Must do' 'B' priorities."
Share March 01, 1995's comic on:
Dilbert and Wally sit at a table eating lunch. Alice walks over and says, "Why is it that I never have time to eat but you MEN are in here every day at 11:35?" Wally replies, "Because the hours we spent upgrading our PCs have finally paid off by greatly improving our efficiency." After Alice has left the table, Dilbert says to Wally, "I thought it was because we get hungry at 11:30?" Wally replies, "We can't reveal all our secrets."
Share May 10, 1995's comic on:
Dilbert reads an e-mail message on his computer screen. The message says, "To: all users. From: network admin. Please refrain from frivolous e-mail. It bogs down the network." Dilbert types a message that says, "To: network admin. From: Dilbert. CC: all users. I agree!" Dilbert arrives at home and asks Dogbert, "Have you noticed there's too much communication in the world, Dogbert?" Dogbert replies, "Yeah, every day at about this time."