Search Results for "body"
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Character
Tuesday March 23,
1999
Tags #body language, #earplugs!, #hammer head bob, #personal spece, #relentless conversation
Transcript
Hammerhead Bob: You can't escape the relentless conversation of hammerhead bob. Buwhahah! Your body language can't stop me! Where you personal space now?! Alice: earplugs, Asok! Ear plugs!
Friday June 04,
1999
Tags #dogbert consults, #teflon, #body, #shake well, #before using
Transcript
Caption "Dogbert Consults" Dogbert hands the boss a spray can. dogbert says, "Spray this Teflon on your body to better ignore the input of your subordinates." The boss sprays. The boss now has a pan for a head. Dogbert says, "Next time, shake well before useing." The boss says, "Who cares what you say?!"
Friday August 10,
2001
Tags #ergonomic evaluation, #key board, #supposed to hurt, #feel hands, #whole body numb
Transcript
The Boss is sitting at his desk. Asok the intern asks stiffly, "May I have an ergonomic evaluation of my chair and keyboard?" The Boss responds, "Asok, work is supposed to hurt. That's how you know you're doing it right." Asok exclaims, "I can't feel my hands!" To which The Boss replies, "My whole body is numb!"
Monday February 25,
2002
Tags #added coffee, #carpet, #coffee stain, #mans face, #miracle, #squirrel body
Transcript
Dilbert, Tina, and Wally are eating lunch. Wally says, "I found a coffee stain on my carpet that looks like a man's face." Tina replies, "It might be a miracle... Or maybe a sign of the end of time." Wally responds, "I hope not. I added coffee and gave him a squirrel body."
Wednesday March 06,
2002
Tags #hostile bahavior, #unacceptable body language, #cold, #eyebrows
Transcript
Catbert says to Tina, "Tina, we've gotten some complaints about your hostile behavior." Catbert continues, "At a recent meeting you crossed your arms. That is unacceptable body language." Tina furrows her brow and says, "Maybe I was cold." Catbert points and exclaims, "Eyebrows! Eyebrows!"
Thursday March 07,
2002
Tags #hostile body language, #not allowed, #cross arams, #stare, #move eyebrows, #nice day, #female, #controlling, #unconscious emotions
Transcript
Tina approaches Dilbert with her arms and face stiff. She says, "Someone accused me of having hostile body language." Tina continues, "I'm not allowed to cross my arms or stare or move my eyebrows or frown." Tina walks past and says, "Have a nice day." Dilbert responds, "Too late."
Wednesday April 09,
2003
Tags #body double, #despots, #most successful, #double, #take hit, #personal dress code, #dress intern
Transcript
Dogbert stands on The Boss' desk and says, "You need a body double. They're popular with your most successful despots." Dogbert continues, "If someone tries to ambush you into making a decision, the double will take the hit." The Boss approaches Asok with a pointy-haired hat in his hands and says, "I want you to think of this as your own personal dress code."
Thursday April 10,
2003
Tags #walk into ambushes, #trap you, #helpful, #body double, #new body double
Transcript
Asok is wearing a mask and pointy-haired hat. The Boss says, "Asok, as my new body double, your job is to walk into ambushes." The Boss continues, "If someone tries to trap you into being helpful, do what I would do." Asok asks, "What would you do?" The Boss replies, "I'd get a body double."
Thursday October 02,
2003
Tags #new hire, #guy, #bothering workers, #love golf, #rain tomorrow, #plans, #sad paper body, #roll in salt, #scoring system
Transcript
Man: "I love golf. Golfing is fun. It's a good day to golf. Do you want to go golfing in the rain tomorrow at 6 A.M.?" Wally: "No, thanks. I have plans to sandpaper my entire body and roll around in salt." Man: "I hope no one ever creates a scoring system for that."
Wednesday September 29,
2004
Tags #inflamed coccyx, #unnecessary body parts, #surgery over work, #napping, #slacker, #watch tv
Transcript
"Do you have a price sheet for removing unnecessary body parts?" "I wouldn't mind a few days away from work, being waited on, watching TV and napping." "You have an inflamed coccyx?" "Yeah, it's gotta go."