Came To Help Comic Strips - Page 5

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

529 Results for Came To Help

View 41 - 50 results for came to help comic strips. Discover the best "Came To Help" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #always a troll, #came to accounting, #had a look, #hair fell out, #horns and tail, #stopped gym, #finance troll, #accounting troll

View Transcript

Transcript

The troll sits at its computer. Dilbert asks, "Were you always a troll?" The troll responds, "No, this happened when I came to accounting." The troll continues, "First my hair fell out. Then I stopped going to the gym." Dilbert responds, "You have horns and a tail." The Troll replies, "When I realized I had a look going, I just went for it."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #executive body guard class, #pounce, #kidnapper, #sacrifice yourself, #inside help, #reimburse

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss approaches Carol at her desk and says, "Carol, I'm sending you to an executive bodyguard class." The Boss continues, "You'll learn how to pounce on a kidnapper and sacrifice yourself to keep me safe." Carol responds, "I'm taking a class called, 'inside help.'" The Boss says, "I can't reimburse for that."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #impossible assignment, #right place, #reword, #objectives, #match, #analyzed, #feasibility, #project, #discontinue

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert is home in his bathrobe. He says to Dogbert, "Can you help me weasel out of an impossible assignment?" Dogbert replies, "You came to the right place." Dogbert continues, "Gradually reword the objectives of the project until one day they match what you've already done." Headline: Six Months Later. Dilbert says to The Boss, "I successfully analyzed the feasibility of discontinuing the project." The Boss responds, "Success!"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #decions, #dark demon, #ineffective management, #help deciosn, #requested smitting

View Transcript

Transcript

"Uh-oh, someone wants me to make a decision." "I summon the dark demon of ineffective management to smite the person who wants this decision!!!" "Maybe I could help you make the decision." "I requested smiting."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #no written objectives, #free to help, #personal philosophy

View Transcript

Transcript

wally: I'm cruising into my fifth month with no written objectives. some philosophers would say that having no objectives means Im free to help any team that asks. Wally: My personal philosophy is more along the lines of hiding.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #help alice, #tried working harder, #become dependant

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally, I want you to go help Alice on her project." "Have you tried working harder? Sometimes thta works." "I hope she doesn't become dependent on my help."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #help alice, #work harder, #expect to happen

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss: Wally, I asked you to help Alice on her project but all you did was tell her to work harder." "You can't just tell someone to work harder and expect it to happen!"" Wally: "Aren't you doing that right now?" The Boss: "Shut up and go work harder."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #evil director, #human resources, #help balancing, #personal life, #no love, #sound sunhealthy, #pill crybaby, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Catbert: Evil Director of Human Resources. "I need help balancing my career with my personal life." "I recommend a book called "No one will ever love you." It'll crush your hope for a personal life and free up more time for work." "That sounds unhealthy." "Take a pill, crybaby."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #work ethic, #input, #something came up

View Transcript

Transcript

Coworker: Can I get your input by Friday? Wally: Absolutely, unless something comes up. Coworker: How often does something come up? Wally: More than you'd think. Coworker: What exactly are we talking about? Wally: I'd love to chat, but something just came up.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #happiness, #work ethic, #busy work, #cheerful, #form of insanity, #worthless assignments, #professional help, #psychology

View Transcript

Transcript

Asok: I completed the busywork you assigned to me and I'm still cheerful! I don't know how I do it. I really don't. I assume it's a form of insanity. Do you have more worthless assignments I could do before I seek professional help? Boss: Yup.